Kings Park Psychiatric Center: Digging a Little Deeper

little ukraine: 16th Mar 2009 - 20:38 GMT

breaking into kings park is a rite of passage for anyone who went to high school on LI...

Peter: 17th Mar 2009 - 14:15 GMT

i cant believe ive never been here... definitely adding it to the list. great photos, as usual, sean...

Chris in South Portland, Maine: 29th Mar 2009 - 01:03 GMT

Sean, this site continues to be such a resource, not just to writers and artists, but to clairvoyants, silent psychologists and historians... anyone who works just outside the confines of the language arc as an art form. Thank you again for leaving it as much intact as you possibly can, including all contributions as part of the living testimony that this place and especially this site is capable... of drawing the human family closer and closer together in the most peculiar way... an invisible appreciation of human suffering that would otherwise not find expression except in the departed Souls who went in one door and mysteriously out the other cosmic one, never to return. More power to you and everyone who arrives and contributes here. It is always so relaxing to come and look over the treasures everyone leaves on your site. Thank you so much. - C.

Sean Hopkins: 29th Mar 2009 - 02:01 GMT

Wow Chris, thank you. Receiving feedback like that is what makes my photo hunts so worthwhile.

Doug: 29th Mar 2009 - 06:17 GMT

Can't imagine KPPC at night?? I worked there for seven years in the late 70's. All shifts, seen it all, shock therapy, self mutilations, suicides, assaults, etc. The photos bring back lots of memories, both good and bad. Haunted? you bet! The place has an amazing network of tunnels linking all the buildings to the power house. The right of passage for us was to gain access to the tunnels and go as far as we could. Group 4 (the complex accross from the power house) had a multitude of sub-basements with dirt floor cages. That place was gruesome. You might want to check out the cemetaries on and off the grounds, one is behind the junior high school and another is off of Indian Head Road. I can go on for hours, enough for now. I miss alot of my old co workers!!

Peter: 29th Mar 2009 - 06:26 GMT

shock therapy self
mutilations suicides
assaults haunted wow!

David: 29th Mar 2009 - 15:27 GMT

Check this out!!! www.opacity.us/site3_kings_park_psychiatric_center.htm

Sean Hopkins: 29th Mar 2009 - 15:30 GMT

Aaaah the tunnel system, now THAT'S ballsy!!

www.freewebs.com/kingsparkpsychiatriccenter/tunnels.htm

Cliff: 2nd Apr 2009 - 09:10 GMT

I believe in ghosts, past lives, haunting and such. These are great photos and I'm sure a lot of bad things happened here, would love to visit and walk through. My friend said he could not even leave the car whe he visited, he picked up on so many things and activities there. Nice. Thanks for photographing.

Taylor: 9th Apr 2009 - 04:38 GMT

Niice pics. Very Creepy. I live on the west coast and starting looking into the place after reading an article in a photography magazine www.shutterbug.net/techniques/pro_techniques/0409spirit/index.html I would LOVE to go check it out and take pictures but I'm sure I would have peed my pants at LEAST once before I was done.

www.inthecrush.com/antikythera

Sean Hopkins: 28th Apr 2009 - 00:31 GMT

More photos here...

Chris: 28th Apr 2009 - 01:37 GMT

There is a continuity of the human Soul which communicates itself to us and through us in response to it - through KPPC as vehicle. What is beginning to happen now is the whole facility is beginning to open itself to you and your camera. A veil or energy membrane which protects history from fools is being dropped and you are starting to see in a different way and more accurately. The buildings are probably talking to you now with their precise historical voices. Those voices will have great accuracy and your camera is already grabbing them left and right with their new energy to which you are so clearly responding, so you are tuned right into it. I have noticed your pictures are sharper and your vision is more keenly intuited in each instance to catch the feeling which draws you and not just the geometric shapes and structures as from before when you had first begun documenting all the buildings like so many lost toys. At first it was buildings and shapes. Now what is happening is that your camera, because of the effect this place is having on you, is beginning to catch the fact these buildings are places where things HAPPENED. Awful things, unnecessary things, forced things, gruesome things, passing things. Things requiring great endurance of the collective psyche of the inhabitants - THEIR collective unconscious endured and therefore conquered the whole thing. What they left behind which is invisible is their courage. It is impressed upon every brick in the facililty. Anonymous eyes saw every corridor, window, lock, affront, cruelty and missing dinner. Something new is starting to happen and the whole place is manifesting a new face for you. It is almost like you have gone past the familiar photographic rite of passage and now the buildings are ALLOWING you to see them even more clearly. It would not surprise me at all if you felt drained after a day of photographing the grounds and all the events which happened there through your images. That other dimension is now present in all of your work; whereas, before we had great photos of shapes, now we have great photos of feelings. The place is drawing you in so you can FEEL the historical events as well as document the remains of them. Thank you again for the tremendous amount of work that getting in that close demands. I just stroll along with you, and stop to study the details which are now speaking loudly enough to be heard, even to the casual viewer. It is very much like KPPC itself has named you; it is now finally allowing you - to be its official photographer. In this sense, history is indeed being made and will remain and increase in significance. Your photographs will have tremendous historical importance. You may be sure of this. Sent with deep appreciation, again, from Chris in South Portland, Maine, U.S.A. 27 April 2009 ~ Monday evening ~ 9:24 P.M.

greythreestoogeswatertower: 5th May 2009 - 21:54 GMT

Waxing poetic about a mental hospital will never give an outsider a real picture of life there. First of all, it was a home, not only to the patients, but also to a number of employees. Secondly, it was a mental hospital. Yes, the patients were crazy (a term that was used before political correctness changed our language) or, you might prefer to call them lunatics, morons, idiots, etc., all of which were clinical designations at one time in the past. The patients were put there for a purpose, either to prevent harm to them or to prevent them from harming others. It is as simple as that. I have come across writings of supposed former patients of the old institutions, many of whom claimed that they were normal or had some "issues" and that they were put there against their will. People were simply not rounded up off the street and institutionalized. Oh, the name in the title above was a favorite saying of one of my patients there in the late 1970s.

Kevin: 12th May 2009 - 05:20 GMT

I took a tour of this facility a few years ago given by a local historian (who actually had keys and legal access to the buildings).

Earily on many of the patients were simply alcoholics, drug addicts or homosexuals. All considered untreatable moral deviants at one point in our medical history. Many of these people underwent drastic irreversible "remedies". The cures being worse than the malady. The road to hell...

Every patient who died in the facility underwent a full autopsy. For medical research reasons to examine "diseased" brains.

There was about 150 buildings at the facility's peak. Including their own power station with two very large electrical generators. At it's peak this was a town of about 10,000 people.

Sean Hopkins: 30th Jul 2009 - 00:04 GMT

Once again, made the trip up there and this time I got some indoor shots.

Seaniedawg: 2nd Aug 2009 - 02:00 GMT

Inside Building 21. Built in 1957, it was used for geriatric patients, drug treatment, and also served as an infirmary.

Outside the building...

This is Potters Field Cemetery, home to hundreds of nameless, forgotten deceased. At the entrance gate lies this plaque...

And here is the view that lies beyond it...

However, as you traverse the field you should look down periodically, because you may find one of the forgotten. Unfortunately, they've been relegated to a mere number...

Deven K: 14th Sep 2009 - 03:53 GMT

Sean Hopkins, and just about anyone else: I plan on visiting Kings Park with a few buddies of my own in the near future. It'd be my third trip up there. I usually bring a small tripod and (unfortunately) a relatively cheap camera. Point is, I was wondering if anyone is going up again any time soon. It would be cool to meet some fellow photo hunters/explorers. Send me an email, phoosh@gmail.com.

Rich: 30th Sep 2009 - 04:00 GMT

I got locked up in this place back in 86 for a drug overdose. If you guys think this place is creepy now, you should have lived there. I was scared everyday of my life in there. If you weren't really crazy when you went in, you were by the time you got out. It took a long time for me to get over that place. Needless to say, I never took drugs again.

anon (c-76-101-111-30.hsd1.fl.comcast.net): 10th Dec 2009 - 07:26 GMT

ever since i went into building 93 and 15 this summer,i can't stop dreaming about that damn pool.sometimes i dream i can't get out,we should have never gone messing with ghost,nothings been the same since.

anon (c-76-101-111-30.hsd1.fl.comcast.net): 10th Dec 2009 - 07:42 GMT

Joke and play all you want with that place,but if you like to go alot you will fine what you really didn't want to see.Once you open the door to ghost you can never really close it.

Jason aka Nightraven: 11th Dec 2009 - 07:50 GMT

I have been to KPPC many times both during the night and during the day. I can still recall the eerie feeling I got when I saw Building 93 emerge from the misty fog of the night. It was raining on that first night. I got a chill down my spine just at the sight of Building 93. However, I knew deep down inside I had to enter.

I didn't get my chance during the first visit. After a brief encounter with security and hearing someone set off the alarm from Building 7 it seemed like a bad omen to stay any longer. Instead, I only managed to go into Building 23.

I returned the next day during the daylight hours because I had to see how everything looked in the day time. It was magnificent. I knew I'd have to return. I had to go into Building 93 no matter how many visits it took me to travel from Yonkers to Kings Park.

I got my wish during my very next visit. I went in through an opening in the front that no longer exists. I searched the lower floors and ran out of time before I could explore further. It was raining during this visit, too.

I eventually returned to Building 93, but once again I didn't have enough time to check everything I wanted to check. I hit a lot of traffic getting there and my exploration started later than planned. Plus, I lost two flashlights while running and hiding from police.

Finally, on my fifth visit to KPPC I was able to fully explore the wonders of Building 93. I took photos of the murals on the wall. I went all the way up to the top floor and stepped out onto the roof. It was exhilirating. I felt a feeling of accomplishment that night. I walked back down crossing every single floor from one side to the other as I left. I ended my night sitting on the bleachers at Tiffany Field. Not once did I run into or see any security. It was a great night.

Something even happened as I left the field, which left me baffled. I was with two others when I went there. I thought one was behind me as we walked up the wooden staircase to leave. I heard him back there, but when I looked ahead of me he was at the top of the stairs. I turned around to find no one was behind me at all. I know I heard someone walking behind me. I heard the movement and the footsteps.

I once heard that the field was haunted by a former patient named Amanda. She was abused by her father and grew up hating men. She tried to take her life numerous times by slashing her wrists, but ended up becoming a patient at Kings Park. She was a young girl with long curly strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes. Don't ask how I know this because I will not tell. Is there anyone out there who knows of this girl besides me and my crew?

If so, please write back to me on myspace at this profile... GInvestigators or you can send me a message to Ginvestigators@aol.com. I would greatly appreciate it.

Jason aka Nightraven: 11th Dec 2009 - 08:08 GMT

Just for the record I do believe in ghosts because I have seen them with my own eyes. I have heard them with my own ears. I also had witnesses and pictures to prove it. Check out the profile on myspace that I previously mentioned to see for yourself.

Anyone who does not believe in ghosts is just fooling themselves. Denial is something all too familiar with people who can't deal with accepting something that they do not want to accept because it is beyond their realm of belief. That doesn't make it so. It takes a bigger person to admit something weird than to poke fun at it and dismiss it as nonsense.

I can take you someplace where you will become a believer real fast.

Christine Ross: 19th Dec 2009 - 23:42 GMT

I grew up the next town over and we spent many a teenage nights trolling the grounds of KPPC in the early 90's. Back then security wasn't that tight and we were able to get into quite a few buildings. It was exhilarating and intense even though most of the time we were accompanied by stupid teenage boys who were "too cool" to tune into the aura and vibes that place sent off. I always felt an overwhelming sense of sadness, as well as a compulsion to connect with whatever energy was still there. Just looking at the photos brings it all back to me. Thumbing through crumbling books and kicking around rusted cans, even at 17 I felt such an enormous sympathy for the people who used to live there. Just the method in which the entire center was literally abandoned, leaving tons of shit there to rot away- things that once belonged to people, things that each had a story of their own to tell, it was very emotional for me.

We brought our Ouiga board one time. we were very into the paranormal, my friends and i. we even played oiuga right on top of a grave in a damn cemetery for christ's sake. but let me just tell you, we could not play for long at KPPC. it was too intense and the board went crazy and we just had this severely ominous feeling take over so we literally got the HELL out of there that night. It was too much, there was too much going on.

Looking at these pics are comforting to me on some level though, so thank you for sharing them. My brother was only a year younger than I, and we shared friends. He accompanied us on many of our high school adventures to KPPC. He passed away almost two years ago and I miss him so much. Being able to recall on the memories I have of him, with him, as wild teenagers running around the abandoned halls of this place, they make me smile.

Seaniedawg: 21st Dec 2009 - 02:20 GMT

Christine, here are some more for you...

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine: 11th Jan 2010 - 22:23 GMT

I never went away, Sean, I have been here all along, reading all the entries. Here I am again to compliment and Thank You again for all you do to make this website work. It is time for me to "wax poetic" again? (lol) I am tuned to this place, the buildings. I can feel them. How I would love to see some photographs of Building 93 during a blizzard - ! My God, what courage that would take.. with the wind whooping through the broken windows, pushing and blowing random papers around inside the vacant rooms. Rattling the roof, spinning fury from the dust within. The place speaks to me. And the snow being blown into whorls and whirls of spinning spirals of snow during the gale. I am thinking particularly of the view from Potter's Field during such a blizzard. I have been here all along. It is good to come back for a moment with silent appreciation for everything you have done to make this place live in my memory. During personal adversity, I reflect on the stillness of the vacant buildings at night, motionless,cold, filled to overflowing with memories, or in the sunny afternoons, with the sunlight turned golden, moving slowly across the walls of the day rooms looking like being in church, too obvious to ignore, the voice of the sunlight stopping the heart in admiration of the sanctity to whose home this really was... this whole place speaks to me. I come to this place in my mind when I want to relax and let go. When I want to bring my creative writing mind to a standstill in awe of those who were residents in this vast place. Transient souls, migrating in one day and then out, forever. The pure resourcefulness and compassion of strangers distanced only by their behavior, and here you have brought all of us such magnificent photo records of their home, their ways, their pain and their endurance. I will always take great strength from their having come and gone. This may not be easy to understand, but I draw tremendous comfort from KPPC, and it is almost all due to the time and effort you have put into the work you have created to bring this to us without altering even one small bit of it. The place it itself may have gone to ruin, but there is still enough of it left to sustain the spirit of any man who is afraid, lost, frightened or confused. In the stillness rests the epiphany of triumph which comes from enduring uncertainty in the presence of maturing within one's one being. Thank You, Sean Hardy, for your magnificent historical and literary contribution to the enrichment of all of us. At 66, it all helps me keep my life in perspective and to find compassion for others the best way to heal the illusion of the force my own personal issues might press upon me. Happy New Year, 2010, to you Sean, and to all who are reading this. I am so looking forward to those blizzard photographs of the place with snow whipping around almost in white-out conditions! Along that tiny balcony atop Building 93, we're talking desktop backgrounds kind of stuff! (lol) I note they are also preserving a HUGE piece of the adjacent national river park recreational area at the foot of KPPC grounds, as well. Amazingly positive stuff. They have captured the diamond in the rough, finally. The voices of the dead are thunderous. Corraling the ghosts to reclaim the land. - Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine, U.S.A. 11 January 2010

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine: 15th Jan 2010 - 22:06 GMT

Chris Grasse's Corrections: "... in the presence of one's own being." Also,
reference to "the adjacent national river park recreational area" is a reference to the new stewardship program for Nissequogue River State Park. Go here for further information: http://www.seagrant.sunysb.edu/article.asp?ArticleID=310
And also here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nissequogue_River_State_Park

BrewsterM: 25th Jan 2010 - 00:14 GMT

I recently discovered my great-great grandmother is buried in the potter's field you photographed (the old Indian Head Road Cemetery). I am currently attempting to precisely locate her grave and if possible, place a memorial. Although she had many family members in New York and Connecticut when she died at age 87 (in 1927), it appears none of them showed up for the funeral - I guess that's what happened back then: place you in the funny farm and then forget you. Well, it's 83 years later and I'm coming to find you, grandma. Better late than never...

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine 9th February 2010: 10th Feb 2010 - 02:27 GMT

Well, we are going to have blizzard conditions at Kings Park Psychiatric Center probably tonight, going right on through until tomorrow sometime. I mean, how often does that happen? Hmmm - ? Little did I know the weather would cooperate so well. If I had my old Leica, this would be the kind of weather I would choose to grab some pictures of the whole hospital complex, the wilder the better; especially Building 93, which so perfectly lends itself to blizzards, not of the human kind for once, but of the weather variety, this time around... I'll bet it will be wild there later tonight... Submitted by Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine, 9 February 2010

Jeannine Fetzer: 11th Feb 2010 - 12:38 GMT

Wow, just came upon this. I'm 43 now and have been living in Cali for yrs but grew up in Kings Park and my mom and oldest brother worked at this place. I was always creeped out when driving by it. I only remember it when it was up and running, not like the pics I have seen on here, but then again I moved away from KP when I was just 11 yrs old.

Fiona: 18th Feb 2010 - 07:57 GMT

I am writing a fiction novel on Kings Park (in late 1950s) and am hoping to get as much information on the place as possibly, if anyone could possibly email me at Fiona_Parlem@yahoo.com maybe to just swap stories that would be amazing. I would love to visit Kings Park-just NY in general but unfortunately I live in CA and traveling is not a possibly :(
These pictures are absolutely astounding those guys I love them! Especially ones where the fisheye lense was used, those are very creative!

jessss b: 1st Mar 2010 - 02:04 GMT

okay so today i went there, and this was the scariest thing i have ever saw. since it had all snow out there was alot of snow i gues on the top of the building. and we got in through a hole in the fence though the back area, where one of the stairs all of the sudden a huge pill of snow falls ontop of me and my boyfriend and a couple of our friends and liget every single one of us fell. than we were trying a way to get inside. in the back area we found stairs that kinda went into this tunnel area, that i gues lead into one of the rooms in the bottle. and just walking through it creeped me out, every couple of seconds we herd just echos and noices, everything the littlest noice was made, made a pericing echo and it was just so unbelivaably scary. when we got to the 3rd floor , there had a no smoking sign, and me and my boyfriend were smoking a ciggart and all of the sudden a huge wind just comes and puts it out, but it was in a room with no windows or anything, 2 mins later our flashlights died. we all ran as quick as we could back outside, and my whole pants riped, but i dont remember getting cought onto anything.

frodo: 23rd Apr 2010 - 23:14 GMT

Dude the laundry building with the you think this will keep me out graffiti on it, u can get in, i got in today actually, you gotta go around and hoist urself up on this long hallway tahts sorta caved

frodo: 23rd Apr 2010 - 23:20 GMT

ive been to 93 few times, suggestions on how to get in? besides tunnels

Nicole: 22nd May 2010 - 19:44 GMT

Hey everyone, I just found this sight and I find it surreal. Don't get me wrong it isn't bad, I believe in spirit an aura and everything. I have lived in Kings Park since I was three and I always knew the psych center was a big deal but I thought it was only for the people around here, lets face it that’s really the only thing in Kings Park. Anyway it makes me proud to say I live here. I am writing a short story and I was wonder if anyone could give me some info on a female patient (middle age). I want to base one of my characters off someone who lived in the psych center and I want it to have some true fact.

Taylor: 27th May 2010 - 05:34 GMT

i have lived on long island my whole life but found out my aunt who died 2 years after i was born died of aids at kppc. she lived there for many years after being transferred from albany psych ward and also pilgrim state. i never met her so i dont know exactly how crazy she was but when i was younger i found many of the same looking id cards of hers when she was in her 40's in my grandmothers house, not knowing what they were i put them back. turns out they were her id cards for kings park insane asylum. i dont know where the cards are today but i wish i knew because i myself have been to kppc twice. i got in 93 both times and the medical building once. i got some nice shots and i brought a picture of my aunt in my pocket when she went, i feel like even if the place is haunted she will somehow protect me. although its scary and upsetting i feel as if i am visiting her now, doing something i would have done if i could have, and i want to find those ids so ican find out exactly where she lived.

Nicole: 29th May 2010 - 18:39 GMT

That is really sad, I am sorry about what happened to her. I think it is cool that you feel like she is protecting you because I completely believe in that stuff, I believe there are spirits with good intentions as well as bad ones. That brings me back to my question before would it be okay if I used your aunts name in my short story, which would be all I use in my short story I wouldn’t use anything personal. In full disclosure she would be the spirit of villain bent on revenge for the wrongs of the Psych Center.

Jason aka Nightraven: 30th May 2010 - 02:43 GMT

I am also planning to write a book about KPPC, but this one will be documentary-style. I have loads of pics and info to use including old history and actual patient names. I am not done doing research, but I will be willing to share some info with both Nicole and Fiona for your stories. I will be in touch... gotta go to work now.

By the way, if anyone has info on KPPC that they can share with me I would be very grateful. I am especially looking to talk to someone who was a patient or former worker there.

You can contact me at Ginvestigators@aol.com.

Jason aka Nightraven: 3rd Jun 2010 - 02:37 GMT

I have just spent the past three days and nights doing massive amounts of research and collecting very old photos of KPPC, which include patients, staff members, Building A (the former main office building), Buildings C & D, photos of several buildings while they were under construction (3, 80 and 93), and soon I will go meet with the director of the Kings Park Heritage Museum to get some more information. Afterwards, I will be paying the library a little visit and since it closes at 9pm that night, there is only one thing left to do at that time... more... um, research. Hands on kind of stuff. By the way, I am considering using some stuff from these blogs in my book. Is that alright with all of you? I will give credit where it is due, of course, and inform you all if you are named in my book. I thought it would be good to make some of you an official part of KPPC history. Of course, I am not using the entire blog. Just the parts that I think will help tell the story of KPPC properly.

Jason aka Nightraven: 3rd Jun 2010 - 02:37 GMT

I have just spent the past three days and nights doing massive amounts of research and collecting very old photos of KPPC, which include patients, staff members, Building A (the former main office building), Buildings C & D, photos of several buildings while they were under construction (3, 80 and 93), and soon I will go meet with the director of the Kings Park Heritage Museum to get some more information. Afterwards, I will be paying the library a little visit and since it closes at 9pm that night, there is only one thing left to do at that time... more... um, research. Hands on kind of stuff. By the way, I am considering using some stuff from these blogs in my book. Is that alright with all of you? I will give credit where it is due, of course, and inform you all if you are named in my book. I thought it would be good to make some of you an official part of KPPC history. Of course, I am not using the entire blog. Just the parts that I think will help tell the story of KPPC properly.

Sean Hopkins: 4th Jun 2010 - 20:11 GMT

Jason, in regards to using these photos, email me at seaniedawg@aim.com to discuss

Jason aka Nightraven: 4th Jun 2010 - 23:53 GMT

Sean, I sent you an email detailing my book plans. Thanks for getting back to me so soon.

Tati: 9th Jun 2010 - 20:15 GMT

Hello Sean, I think you have an amazing website here... I was wondering if you can provide me with some information regarding KPPC. Last night I was there, my goal was to enter building 93 and do some paranormal investigation. Unfortunately, I was there for 2 hrs looking for an entrance to building 93 but i found none. From my previous research on the internet it states that there are tunnels that lead to each building. I was not able to find these tunnels, or should I say I saw something that would be a tunnel but it was welded shut. I found everything to be welded(lol) Although I was not able to get into the building, the experience was truly amazing, there are some things that were heard that are unexplainable but very intriguing. I'm not going to stop until I get into these buildings and do an investigation to find out if KPPC is truly haunted. Please get back to me at your earliest convenience. Feel free to email me @ tpenalvert@hotmail.com. I would really appreciate it. Thank you.

anon (ool-457eb1f2.dyn.optonline.net): 10th Jun 2010 - 12:52 GMT

Tati, when I first went to KPPC I went there for the same reasons as you... looking for ghosts. Instead, I found myself becoming obsessed with the history of KPPC and I have since been into several buildings. I am currently writing a book about KPPC and will be going there to do some upclose and personal research quite soon. Last time I was there I heard someone using a cutting tool to get into Building 93 from the tunnels. There was a way in that day from the outside, though. It was a bit of a tight squeeze, though. Besides, after going to the top of 93 and working my way down making a pass across every floor I kind of lost interest in truly exploring it further.

As far as I can tell there was only a small amount of evidence of haunting at that building. I got one misty photo in the basement, my EMF meter went off once on the first floor, and my friend recorded some EVPs. Supposedly, there was a gurney that once moved on its own in the basement. You might hear noises and banging while you are there, but that is quite normal. The wind blows doors shut all the time and don't fool yourself into believing you are the only one there exploring. You might be hearing me!

Tati: 10th Jun 2010 - 19:44 GMT

Hey Sean, I appreciate the information you provided. Let me know if you know of any other entrances to building 93. I would still love to do an investigation of my own just to explore that wonderful building.

Sean: 13th Jun 2010 - 05:56 GMT

Hey for someone who has never been there what type of feeling do you get when you are there. Also whats the best time to go during the day or during the night?

joe: 14th Jun 2010 - 17:16 GMT

I worked there for years 81 through mid 90's. cool site. There were some very sick people there, and the patients were not well either. I started at 21 years old so i didn't think that much of it. Sure brings back some memories. Beautiful grounds. I find it disturbing to see the disrepair of the place , it was vibrant and full of life as I remember it.

Jason aka Nightraven: 15th Jun 2010 - 08:47 GMT

Hey, Joe... if there are any significant memories or incidents that you remember that you think might be useful for my book, then please let me know. I am writing a detailed book about the history of KPPC complete with photos. Any real accounts from former workers would be very helpful. Thanks. If you'd rather not post it here, then my email address is Ginvestigators@aol.com.

joe: 15th Jun 2010 - 14:24 GMT

Jason, many incidents in 14 yrs, theres something my co-workers and I say,"you can't make this stuff up". In my days, we had 34 pts on a ward, yrs before they kept a census of around 85 probably with less staff. WE kept pretty good track of who was where, but I don't know how they did it years ago.We used a head count. I had at least 5 family members that worked there over 2 generations. It was definately a small city. when I look at pics of these buildings, I can remember them all functioning. the laundry, storehouse , pharmacy in 93, med;surg, safety,community store(the bldg. next to 15).I had pts. that started out on the childrens unit, and were my pts. at age 38 to 50 something. some employee"s were ther over 45 yrs.When my dad started in 1956 the hospital had around 9000 pts. and in 1981 there were I believe around 900.

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Paula: 6th Jul 2010 - 03:45 GMT

My name is Paula and I'm 25. I'm trying to find my father. My mother, who is in my life, and him were both patients at Kings Park and also Central Islip. She has almost no information on him even thought they were together for almost five years. My mother's tried to give me all the info she could but her memory is hazy. They would have been patients somewhere between 1980 and 1985. I know she was in and out a lot. He was an addict as was she. She was also an intense pyromaniac. Is there any ex-employee that might know anything? Or at least how I could start looking? My mothers name is Elizabeth "Liz" Mackey and she was in her twenties. My fathers name is either Joseph Donald White or Donald Joseph White. They called him Joe. He was in his forties.
Any help would be amazing.
acceptthelove@yahoo.com

Jason aka Nightraven: 10th Jul 2010 - 23:11 GMT

Thanks for your input, Joe. What building did you work in? Which ward? Hey, I don't suppose you know what the building designation for the library was on the main boulevard... was it Building 33?

Hey, Paula... KPPC Records went to Pilgrim State in 1996. Here is the contact information that I have on file:

Susan Alvar, Facility Administrative Services
Pilgrim Psychiatric Center
W. Brentwood, NY, 11717
(631) 761-2882

Paula, you can also post a comment on the KingsParkMuseum.com forum. You'll have to make a profile first. There are a lot of former workers from the hospital that write there and check the posts. Someone might be able to help you out.

Barry: 19th Jul 2010 - 20:10 GMT

Hey, I am very interested in these buildings especially 93, I would love to get in and take some photos of my own, if anybody knows some ways in please let me know, ill give you my email. Also is there any alarms in bulding 93??

Jason aka Nightraven: 22nd Jul 2010 - 02:12 GMT

You're welcome, Paula.

Barry, there are no alarms in Building 93. Only Building 7 has an alarm. The best way to enter 93 is to walk around it and check the windows. You'll most likely find an entrance. Keep in mind increased exposure to the asbestos and chipped lead paint can cause cancer. Therefore, it is a smart idea to buy an asbestos protection mask. You can get one online. Just search for it. As exciting as it might be to enter these buildings it is not worth your health.

Barry: 31st Jul 2010 - 06:13 GMT

Jason, Thanks man yea I have a mask I got one a few days ago. I know it is pretty dangerous in the buildings I dont plan on staying to long, im just gunna take some pics and film my journey through the building

Jason aka Nightraven: 4th Aug 2010 - 01:44 GMT

Be careful, Barry. Security is lighter than it used to be, but if you get caught you will probably be arrested. You shouldn't go alone either. If something happens to you, no one will know where you are. I went alone once recently. It wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done, but I needed to get something important for the book I am writing.

Now that I am on the subject... I need to ask everyone out there for a favor. I have spoken to several former workers of the hospital and they have all given me great stories and told me about how much they enjoyed their time working at the hospital. That's all well and good, but I know there is another side to be heard.

I want to hear from former patients. I need to hear how the former patients felt about the hospital. I need someone to give me a story I can tell. You can remain anonymous if you want. I'd just like to know what building or ward you were at and how you felt about your time there. Were you there long? Why were you there? Were you treated good or bad? Did you make any lasting friendships?

Anything you can tell me will be useful. I know some of you who read this were patients. Please, talk to me and help me out with this book. Thank you.

KPSHMRU: 7th Aug 2010 - 22:38 GMT

Jeannine,

If you have a brother named Bob, I graduated high school with him and worked with him for a time in Group II during the mid 1970s.

Joe: 17th Aug 2010 - 00:20 GMT

Hey Jason I just happened to stumble upon this. I LOVE IT!!! I was at Pilgrim Hill fall of 09 doing a photo shoot. There was about 6-7 photogs and about 5 models. FREAKY PLACE to say the least.

Before we did any shooting we did some exploring. One guy who set everything up had extensive knowledge of the buildings. He even brought us to the 16 person morgue!! We walked the tunnels to get around the building we were in. I don't know how I didn't crap my pants!!

WE even had an incident with an OLD rusted caseman window with NO glass in it and NO WIND or BREEZES, slam open and shut a few times on us. I would LOVE to get into Kings Park with my camera!!

How long til your book comes out? I'll DEFINITELY be looking for it!!

Jason aka Nightraven: 20th Aug 2010 - 07:01 GMT

I am hoping to get it out by the middle of next year. I still have a lot of research to do on the older buildings that no longer exist, as well as a few buildings I cannot find any information on at all. I have some guys who used to work there helping me out and the director of the Kings Park Heritage Museum has also been very helpful.

Try not to get yourself into trouble sneaking into the buildings. It is illegal to be inside, not to mention hazardous to your health. If you do go in to another building you should make sure to wear an asbestos safe mask. It's not worth getting cancer in the long run just to have a few cheap thrills.

Also, just for the record, this is Sean Hopkins' blog, although he might not say much on it. He does read it when he has the time. I like to think of myself as a guest who is willing to help out curiosity seekers since I do have a pretty good knowledge of KPPC. I don't want Sean to think I am trying to take over his blog, especially since he has been so helpful to allow me to use his photos in my book.

That being said... I am off to check other sites. Later.

former long islander: 21st Aug 2010 - 04:01 GMT

looking at some of these pics. looked very similar to a Law & Order episode, when they visited an abandoned orphange. the pics. posted esp. the outside stairs, looks exactly the same. Does anyone know if anything has every been filmed there. Looking forward to the book.

shannon: 28th Aug 2010 - 12:54 GMT

I just found this site and I have soooo many feelings about it I am damn near speechless. I grew up on Long Island and I visited my mother there as a girl from ages 7 to 15 yrs of age as I lived in a strict, loveless foster home in East Hampton, NY. And after that I visited on and off for years. My mothers name was Jennie Hallock. She lived in and out of KPPC from @ the ages of 36 to her beneficial death at age 59 that ended her KPPC inflicted pain & suffering. Over time she became institutionalized and after so many years the place became like a familiar "family home" that she kept coming back to that grounded and stablized her when she couldn't take the pressures of "outside life" or was sent back after she screwed up & broke the rules at some adult or group home, etc. She died of a heart attack while sadly unattended in the bathroom of the medical ward at KPPC shortly after recovering from emergency stomach ulcer surgery where she lost more then three quarters of her stomach. I don't know how they expected her to eat. I only know this because the stomach surgeon surprisingly called and asked for my consent for her operation. That was a first. KPPC could be relied upon to tell me next to nothing. Another time she got a large third degree burn on her arm after she past out from medication effects/exhaustion while her arm was resting on one of those old fashioned coil heaters shown in the pictures above while once again unsupervised and neglected in the bathroom during another grave illness. Lawyers wanted me to sue the place but I was too emotionally paralyed to deal with my feelings about going thru with the lengthy and difficult process of sueing KPPC. Plus I would of had to of moved back to New York and take on the State. I could not do that then. It would of been quite an emotional ordeal I was told and I was ill-prepared to handle it. Even though I did visit my mother, it was only about four to maybe six times a year for about two hours. Missing school was not an option and DSS (DCF, CPI) workers were overloaded back then so I had very few visits and so I barely knew her. I could rarely even speak to her over the phone for years. I always privately felt so incredibly B A D for her that when I finally got to have some personal freedom and a good long taste of a splendid, fun, and rewarding life I could not enjoy it and self-sabotaged it as I felt incredibly guilty because her life was so far from the same. It seemed so unfair that she had such an awful life and I felt deeply troubled that I could not change that. At times I felt too guilty to lead and fully enjoy my once exciting and successful college life and dove into deep binges of depression and withdrew from classes and friends and activities and engagements to hide out from life as though I didn't deserve to be happy if she couldn't also be. When I finally graduated from college she and I shared an unrealistic dream of getting her out of there to come and live with me, but I knew that it would be an incredible amount of red tape to go thru to of ever gotton her out. But I never told her that as "the dream" is what kept her hope and spirit alive all those last years. Anyway...it is true that if you think the place is scary now image what it was like for a young, innocent, sensitive girl to have to go and visit a once close and biological loved one there. Unbelievably HER-REN-DOUS!! I would shake inside as the social workers car would enter the place. I had patients chase me down the halls and once a black lady began to immediately strip down naked in front of me when my mother left the visiting room for a couple minutes. I saw things that shocked and deeply tramatized me. Disgusting, wacko men staring at me like parana and one gave me the unsolicited "quick, come here & treat me to a blow job" sign language gesture. That was a gross memory to get over. I saw old ladies slowly shuffling down the hallways like zombies with walkers who looked either half alive or half asleep drooling in their strange, outdated, mismatched, too small or too large, stained or torn outfits or house dresses sometimes smelling like they were badly in need of a shower and/or a diaper change. Lovely! I narrowly escaped a mad Hattichian (sp?)woman who grabbed me by the arm while screaming violently in her native tongue at me shockingly for no apparant reason as I carefully passed by her on the steps thru a building entrance. I was 18 then and I wanted to knock her out. I was so afraid when I was little that I might somehow get lost and get locked in there with them, as every door has its own key. Some staff carried the biggest set of keys I've still ever seen in my life. You'd have to wait while every door was carefully locked and unlocked and hear the eerie echos from the voices, and footsteps and loud doors slamming as there was no carpeting as I recall to ground the sound. She'd always tell me that they were starving her there; that she was always so hungry. What could I do and how could I feel about that? It made me feel guilty to have the luxury of choosing my food and enjoying food until I somehow learned to block out those feelings and thoughts. She become diabetic and so they had her on a diet to lose weight from gaining so much after her breast cancer removal surgery which she insisted upon showing me at age ten. Ugh! I couldn't handle feeling her pain. When I could afford to I'd send her care packages with the approved foods, cigarettes etc., but it was never enough. She'd tell me that other patients would quickly steal her stuff even after she would hide it in her room and that was why she only had the one picture of me she kept hidden in her bra with her cigarettes. I believe she lived for me as I was the "great white hope" and the light in her life and her only visitor all those years that I know of. I wish I could of visited more but I increasingly grew more and more unable to handle it. Everyone abandoned her and I, our relatives that is as I suppose she disgraced them by being in there. Her life was about being good enough to get the priviledge to see me and to get honor passes and other special priviledges. She thought I was the most perfect thing in the world (of which I tried to be pure and good back then). At age 15 she introduced me to her new unenthusiastic psychiatrist by shockingly saying "this is my daughter Judy, she doesn't drink, smoke, or have sex"! Wow, I was appauled and incredibly embarrassed. It was true, but I certainly thought that it was inappropriate for her to tell anyone that, as did he as he finally broke a smile after he choked on his sip of coffee. I was like her best accomplishment in life to her because I was clean, pure, pretty and well-mannered and I really didn't smoke, drink, or have sex or get into any legal trouble. Everyone in that place knew who I was when I came there which was very unnerving to me and that was because she told everyone all about me and showed them my picture. At least I gave her something to be proud of that few of the others had the luxury of. A beautiful daughter with a promising future who wanted to help her out. The ending of visits was always difficult especially for her as it was such a big event or achievement that she worked towards (getting to see me) through good behavior and she'd never have any idea of when she would see me again. Looking back that was hard for both of us. She always wanted to get out of that place. Thats for sure. I couldn't understand exactly how or why she was locked up there. No one would ever tell me shit about why she had to be there or what her diag"nonsense" was. Of course I was underage foster kid so I didn't count. I never got one hour of counseling or therapy as a child for how it felt inside to deal with or cope with the fact that my mother lived in that gigantic (stinkin') mental institution. It was never discussed. It was my secret that few knew. Not something to be proud of especially in East Hampton. She seemed to me like one of the sanist patients in the place, in my opinion. I never heard her talk crazy. She did have a temper though and I knew that at one time she took 800 mgs of Thorazine a day! That's a lot. I knew that she was angry about having to conform to their "rules" about smoking and grounds priviledges, eating and honor cards, visitation, boyfriends etc. She hated being controlled. But don't we all? One time she got mad and exploded for some reason and took out a couple of orderlies. Wow, I was shocked. Two more arrived and they got me out of there pretty quick. I knew she was in trouble now. I was definitely more like her mother trying to encourage her to be good and behave and "to go along with the program" and stay out of trouble for christs sakes like I do I'd say or your'll never get out of here. I remember her hands shaking so badly sometimes while she cried so deeply as she felt so guilty that she could not be a proper mother to me or because she desparatedly wanted to be released from that wretched place and would then beg me to help her get out. Of course thats a lot of pressure when you're twelve. She had no one else to help her or to help me. She worried about me so much. I'd always lie and tell her that I was fine. Truth was I was being systematically emotinally abused and living in constant fear of the frequent spankings or beatings and of being molested when I wasn't in school or doing enless slave labor at the foster home. But I knew I could never tell her any of that as she would of gone completely ba-seeerk in a fit of rage and anger. She would of impulsively tried to escape from the place in a frutile attempt to try and save me even though she had no way or idea of how to get to where I was imprisoned by the DSS at and only get herself more restrictions, less priviledges, and probably an injection and more of the electric shock treatments I presumed to only feel helpless in the end. I'd of liked to of told her about it when the social worker went out for a smoke and to of cried in her arms, yet I always bit my lip and kept quiet and held it all in and kept her forever in the dark and instead gave her words of encouragement to keep her strong enough to endure living there when I did get a chance to see her. It was hard to be a silent but strong girl. She told me you had to learn to fight and stand up for yourself to survive in there or else others would take advantage of you and steal from you and basically defeat you. You had to prove that you were stronger then them or that you were capable of kicking their ass to hopefully deter the other patients from harassing or stealing from you. I was impressed by how strong she was at times. I'd of never of been strong enough to of ever of endured and survived all that she did, so I was a bit in awe of her, yet ashamed of myself for being embarrassed by her on another uncomfortable deep level. One thing about her though is that of all the people I have ever met in my entire life, she was the most real, genuine and honest. I gave her a large jar of loose change I had saved up and immediately, the next second, she had to go and find a black janitorial employee that she owed a quarter to, (25 cents!) so that she could immediately repay him. She could not wait. She was I guess obsessively honest. He told me with a strong southern twaing, "your mother Jennie is one of the nicest people in the world, until somebody crosses her ass and then they'd better watch out 'cause she'll beat the crap out of them". I just knodded still startled by her actions and then his words. In later years I found out to my surprise while she stayed at some kind of half-way-house for the mentally ill or disabled that the gas station nearby would actually front her cigarettes. I suppose that the employees had pity on her and her great addiction to cigarettes but mainly because they KNEW how honest she was and that she would always repay them. I found this out after I gave her some money and she wanted to go there immediately so she could pay her tab. Incredible, as I do not know anyone now or since then who can get any employees at any gas stations to "front them" cigarettes or anything else, not even here in Montana where I currently live. She also had an incredibly bubbly, happy & jovial personality. "Everyone loves Jennie" is what I would hear from the staff. People employed to help her from different agency's would bend over backwards to help her (or give her coffee and cigarettes as she wrote in her brief and sparse letters) and to get her into special programs like art therapy or to a hair dresser or some nail polish etc. She'd tell me of their kind deeds and I could tell from the look on their faces how fond they were of her and geniunely hoped she'd keep steadily improving; that she was one of the special ones to some of them. So....(i just broke down crying after remembering those of you who took the time to care for her and make her feel special when I couldn't)......I am wondering if there are any people out there who may of known her that remember her and might be able or willing to share a tiny story or recall a memory of my mother, perhaps a caseworker, or a staff member or a psychiatrist or even another ex-patient or a grounds keeper. She loved to do art and was very creative. Maybe someone out there helped her with an arts & crafts project. Every gift I ever got from her was handmade, not ever store bought as she was chronically broke. It was clear that all of those people knew her far better then I did as they spent much more time with her then I ever could. I was practically a stranger. Maybe you heard some of her hopes and dreams or some of her feelings for me or her sorrows. It would really touch me to the depths of my soul to hear literally anything authentic. And by the way when she died there, KPPC just sent me a small white box with her ashes in it, with a type written letter that she had died and this was her remains. Inside was the plastic white rosary beads she used to pray with. Thats it. I suppose all of her possessions were stolen soon after her demise or given away. It was like she never really mattered. Somewhere I have a picture of the two of us while on a visit there. If it interests anyone who is writing a book I could find it. Until todays odd feeling to look up KPPC on the internet I had not thought about any of this in many, many years. It is shocking to see the place in ruins. However, I am glad it is shut down and unable to continue to inflict pain and suffering and lead and asbestos poisoning and cruelly impose such inhumane treatment and uncalled for neglect to the chronically downtrodden and unhappy, possessed crazy souls that found themselves there. She died in 1996, to my surprise that was the year that they shut that horrible place down. I wonder what mohth it closed? In my opinion I'd probably feel safer visiting it now knowing that the dead souls that roam the place freely cannot harm me as opposed to when I was 8, 9, or 10 yrs old and I knew that those crazy people definitely could harm me if I didn't keep a close and watchful eye on every one of them who was staring at me when I went to visit and attempted to leave or enter Building 7 or 44 or 23. Often times they screamed out barred windows loud indecent remards that truely scared me. Consequently, in my life I learned that a pre-diabetic can be hypoglycemic for many years as I was for nearly ten years and that untreated hypoglycemic can make a person behave or appear as though they are schizophrenic (sp?) and have great anger issues and short tempers. So, as it is a heredity condition I am certain she had during the sames years that someone decided she was mentally ill and had her committed. That along with how she bucked the system and her iron clad will and strong desire for freedom is what I guess bought her such a long extended stay at KPPC. They didn't know much about nutrition back then and the positive effects of it on mental health and well being. Very unfortunate for my mom. In our times, I doubt quite seriously that she would of spent her life locked up for 23 years in an insane asylum because she clearly didn't seem insane to me. Institutionalized yes, insane no. Emotionally unstable, perhaps, but not enough to be robbed FOREVER of a chance to create and enjoy a bountiful life. To be able to go out in the world freely and get to decorate a home or drive a car or sit by the ocean or create a meal or wash her daughters hair or see her in a play at school were all R O B B E D so unnecessarily of her and me and many others. It was like she was in prison but had not committed any crime that I know of to get committed. Hell, prison would of maybe of been better for her; at least she'd of had the opportunity for parole and of course she'd of had far fewer electric shock therapy treat-ments which by the way are nothing like beauty treatments. It was like we were both in prison. But I surprisingly never blamed her for any of it or harbored any bad feelings towards her for what had happened and that was because I already learned that sometimes our lives are out of our control; that fate deals us a hand and we have to deal with it. Mainly it was that I was certain she loved me and wanted the best for me and that if she could of she would of done anything in the world for me. I knew that completely then. I am glad I was not adopted and that I had the great opportunity to get to know that at least my real mother cared for me so much even if it was from a distance. Love never fails it saids and her love did help me get thru my otherwise loveless and difficult childhood. And of course it would of literally killed her to of had absolutely no contact with me. I don't think any of us can truely imagine how hard it must of been for a single mother to endure being locked up in a mental institution for 20 plus years and half of her only childs' childhood. A living hell in my opinion. I consider myself lucky that such a thing has not happened to me and recalling all of this makes me even more grateful for the life I have and being able to see my son's sweet smile everyday and feel his hugs and kisses. I hope that after all of you get your kicks visiting KPPC that you go home to your loved ones and are a little more greatful for the life and freedom you get to have and pray for the many lost souls of that place who lost such priviledges and pleasures. Pray that they leave that place and go to the light and find their way to Heaven where they need to be. Where they can finally find some peace from the hell they endured here on Earth. It sounds like from what I heard that when the place first began in the early 1900's many of the inmates were actually happy there and felt safe, satisfied and fulfilled. But when I visited there, from '73 on I didn't see anyone who seemed happy, not the patients or the staff. It had an awful, degrading feel to it that seemed to stop my heart when I visited like they were all tired of endlessly waiting for something. Today, it may surprise you but I am actually quite an authority on the reality and existence and disharmony of entities (ghosts) and their effects on mental and physical health. All of you visiting KPPC out there are feeling the presence of a collective co-operative force of thoughts forms from hundreds of entities, the ones who are earth bound and greatly attached to KPPC as it was the only home many of the ole timers ever knew. They were, when they died, scared to leave the place and move on and still are. Worse then the asbestos poisoning and the cancer you might get from visiting the place and the possible arrest is the ENTITIES that can attach on to you or follow you home and live out their delusional fantasies and desires thru you and literally make you sick or insane or drive you to smoke, cheat, overeat or commit crimes, etc. if you don't know how to sage or protect yourself. If there are any shamans out there reading this you will know exactly what I am talking about. By the way I am wondering if any shamans have ever visited the place since it was abandoned? If so I would like to hear from you. Perhaps you share my opinion that most of those inmates or patients would of greatly benefited from entity extraction and soul retrieval work, ya think? That and excellent (perhaps organic) nutrition, creative self-expression, classical music, pets, plants and some chakra balancing and energy work would of done wonders for them along with a non-toxic environment to live in. That is what needs to be done at all mental institutions but if it was done we wouldn't have any and many people would be out of a job and the pharmaceutical companies would be enraged! Stablizing mental illness is big business! I think it would be excellent if a very powerful and strong group of experienced shamans would volunteer to go out there and do a big ceremonial clearing of the place. What a service to mankind! Now that would be something great to read about in a book as a final gesture of goodwill and fairwell to the historic place before it gets demolished. And afterwards (if I was so lucky)I'd like to see a video of 1,000 or more people gathering around KPPC, holding hands and singing the song "Let There Be Peace On Earth & Let It Begin With Me" and think of all of those who wanted peace who lived there and imagine that they find it. And maybe then they can recycle that land into something beautiful again without any reprecussions from any disgruntled spirits or unhappy ghosts that dwell there. And a much improved chapter can be written in the history books of the place and everyone can have some much needed closure for the once successful institution that we forget was originally established with the finest of intentions; as most intentions usually are.

Feel free to contact me at: rainbowlight@bresnan.com peace...

KPSHMRU: 28th Aug 2010 - 19:37 GMT

Shannon,

You seem to have quite a memory about the place. At the time of your mother's admission to the hospital, she could have been admitted under what was known as a "2PC," or Two Physician Consent or by a court order, which would entail the 2PC after evaluation if law breaking was involved. In my years of working there, I never saw anybody who one would consider "normal," in that they suffered from drug or alcohol psychoses, manic depression (now called bipolar disease), or from a number of other psychiatric disorders. The only reason she was there is that she likely could not cope in general society due to her illness or, because of the illness, was being victimized by society at large.

Your description of her acting totally normally and then "flying off the handle" with some sort of provokation while taking Thorazine 800mg q.d. does not leave much to the imagination of why she was there.

Psychosis is an interesting illness. It manifests in various individuals in many ways. Some can cope in society with the lighter forms, such as various neuroses, and, with modern drugs, even some psychoses. However, the medicines do not act on all people to the same degree. A patient could be perfectly lucid and holding a natural conversation with you and two minutes later could be a "raving lunatic." You could not turn your back on some patients under any circumstances because of the potential for violence. However, you soon found out which ones had that potential.

The hospitals had to work with whatever the state provided. They had annual budgets, which determined how much clothing for patients could be purchased and how much staff could be assigned to wards. Most of the clothing I saw patients wearing were donated by charities or, to a lesser extent, by their families. I know from experience that the hospital ran critically low on clothing at times back in the 1970s.

The patients were allowed to eat as much as they wanted at each meal, unless they were under dietary restriction for health reasons. You would not believe how much food had to be discarded after each meal.

Seeing a mental institution only on limited occasions might give one a jaded view of "the inside." However, spending every day there as an employee would give you a much more accurate of life there.

shannon: 30th Aug 2010 - 14:13 GMT

To KPSHMRU,

Thank you for your words and insights. I know I wrote a lot but it was actually a much needed cleansing experience for me that I was unaware I needed. Thanks for reading and commenting.

Yes, it is true that I only saw the place in a limited light; really just a snap shot of the place, yet that was my experience. I thought that someone might like to hear the rare account of how the place affected a half grown child and see it from its viewpoint. To hear some of what I knew of my mothers experience and thus get people to think about how a long term commital to a state (not private or nice) mental hospital (that I felt needed a lot of improvement) adversely affects not only the patients but their families and the relationships within the family and ultimately all of their lives greatly; which is probably something that is generally overlooked by the average person and those still visiting and interested in KPPC. I thought we had an unusally life experience and that some might enjoy or value what I shared in this forum. Be grateful it was not your life experience. I wouldn't wish it upon anyone. If there are others out there who grew up while their loved one or parent was in a mental institution or in KPPC I'd like to hear your from you and hear your story and how it affected you if you care to share it and see if you ever found a way to make peace with it all.

Sorry KPSHMRU, I really didn't mean to bad-mouth the place; it is just what surprisingly flowed out of my mouth. I know that many people did try and help these misfortunate souls and I thank those of you who did who I'll never know. I'm sure that it took a lot of guts to work there and that it was certainly not easy. I realize that the unwanted and unaccepted or those that were a danger to themselves or to society had to be taken care of somehow and if your poor that is what you get, the classy KPPC (just kidding). I just truely wish that the conditions there could of been better, but perhaps so did the staff. Then it would of been easier for relatives to deal with that their loved one was in there and maybe they could of handled it better and of found it easier to visit more often. Maybe if a special visiting area or building would of been set up in a very nice room or two near the front entrance (away from the upsetting wacko's) with refreshments for purchase and a small gift shop and decent furniture and flowers and perhaps a radio and a guard outside it would of been better then going on up to the ward she lived on. My experience I'm sure is vastly different then a lot of others was, even other visitors, different types of patients, and all the different types of employees throughout the different era's of the place. I am sure that a lot of outsiders are jaded about the place as it is like a mystery to many as to why it was once so operational and needed and now is not. And vastly different accounts of the place doesn't help much either along with the condition its been left in or why it was abandoned. Is it true that now mental health professionals feel that to of locked all of them up together on a huge campus was not the best thing for them and so they didn't need all of those large buildings so they abandoned them. How did we go from the place needing to house 10,0000 people to eventually housing only 900. Has drugs for mental health really made such an improvement or is it that societies view of what is okay and acceptable behaviour out in society has changed so much or did the place just become too dangerous to live or work in??? I look forward to reading a book about it once it comes out that hopefully gives many different view points so that the reader can make up their own minds much like a jury as it seems difficult to determine the truth about the place. Ultimately if the place was so great why was it shut down and not kept up & maintained? Because of the asbestos and the lead??? Was it condemned? I'd like to know why? It feels like some of the real truths about the place no one will be willing to reveal or admit, such as why the dead could not have a marker. Even a paint stick wtih their name or ID# on it would of given them more dignity then to of had nothing.

Anyway, I suppose that it could not of been all bad there because after a while my mother expressed that she did enjoy some of the relationships she had formed with some of the residents and staff and I secretly thought she felt a bit relieved deep down when she returned. People liked her. She was full of laughter and could always make other people laugh so... well, you figure it out. She did find some ways to be happy given her circum-stances. What else could she do. I am sure that it does seem much worse to us on the outside then it did to those living there especially after so many years when they forget what life on the outside is like. Just like those living in Ethiopia or Zimbovway (sp?)(third world countries) who don't know about (lets say) American life and so don't know what they are missing. After years of shock therapy and doctors experimenting on them with multiple medications (unlike someone in state prison for 20 years) they forget a lot of things which includes what life on the outside is like. I was the one who knew the difference and what she was missing. In later years, for a time, she was so medicated she didn't even know her own name for two weeks or who I was that surgeon later told me. Eventually all her dreams faded away and she lived in another world a million miles away from me, much like another planet off somewhere in her mind. It was very hard on me and what's worse is that I didn't talk about it. How strange that I can now talk about it now, on the internet, with perfect strangers, and not my closest friends.

Anyway, for the record, part of why I didn't aggressively try to get her out is that I thought about it and I knew that after how often she'd returned to KPPC that if she did come and live with me it would of been a great shock to her and a tremendous change of life and it was incompre-hensable to me how to smoothly transition her to move into a home on a mountain top (where she had no idea of how to cook or clean or drive or be alone etc) with me and my mature fiance in a new far away state, where she'd feel isolated and to also know she'd be unable to ever return to the only friends and way of life that she knew and was accustomed to, even for a visit or to drive by the place. I wasn't sure she wanted that or if she was capable of deciding. Plus I was overwhelmed by how to handle it all. I really didn't know her after being away in college for five years. I also had no idea what her true mental state was or how or what she'd have to do or accomplish to be "qualified" or eligible to be released from KPPC's care, much less if I could handle being around her all the time. And she didn't know anything either. I figured I would need a lawyer and have to spend a lot of time in New York and that it would of cost a bucket load of money that I didn't have. I had to work to live and pay my own bills and college loans and I had to build a career to do this. I also figured it was like that the State of New York owned her and they weren't going to give her up very easily, and not without a big long fight. Plus I would of had to of taken care of her and find a way to get her medicine paid for and administer it and see if I was allowed to, and find a doctor, transfer her records, get her and her disability transfered to North Carolina, bring her to counseling and therapies and work. God only knows all that I would of had to of done to of accomplished it succeessfully or if she or I could even do it long-term and then what would happen. I was not the CNA or nurse type. For the record I told her that it would be after I was married and we'd built our house and then build the cottage or "mother-in-laws" smaller home in the back and that it would take a while to make it happen. She loved the idea. And that was the real plan as I was engaged and he already owned the property to build on and was okay with her living there (as it was 18 acres of a mountain side and had no neighbors nearby). However, the marriage never happened etc and I didn't tell her the dream would not become a reality until more then 5 years later. By then I guess she didn't care as she never brought it up again. Then she just wanted a grandchild, but she didn't meet him either as he was born in 2002 and she died in 1996. Oh well. Failed her again.

Looking back, I do wish that KPPC would of told me or let me in on what was going on with her but they wouldn't or maybe legally couldn't. I don't know. Even at schools they give you quarterly reports and have parent teacher conferences to keep you updated and informed but not KPPC. That was my experience. I felt like I was up against a big brick wall and they were stone-walling me. I was bewildered by the place. It was daunting; all the people and the giant buildings. I suppose I did not know the proper questions to ask when I was young or who to pose them to and sadly, I regret, I eventually gave up and I still feel guilty for allowing myself to be defeated so easily and for ultimately failing her. I guess I just believed that it was my responsibility to save her, but I guess that some people can't be saved. Eventually I had to pull away from her so I could let myself live life, but I am realising now that my unresolved issues over this still impairs my ability to fully enjoy life so it was good for me to recall all of this after 14 years and to at last get to the root or original cause for some of my issues. I see clearly now that some of them resulted from my childhood experience of her being in there for so long and my visiting the place and my feeling like I should save her or at least greatly improve her life. If I'd of known the circumstances of how or why she got committed or how she acted when I was not around or was given an explaination of her diagnosis I could of understood it all better. It is not like I never asked anyone. I did once after a visit when I was 18 or 19. I asked to speak with her psychiatrist, a foreign man, who I heard was in and could become available. I waited for him for a while but tsssk...he walked right past me into his office like I was invisible in my business attire and shut the door. I mean I certainly did not look like a patient and someone had to of informed him I was coming as I was shown to his office. I knocked and he came out and shut the door. I asked about my mother diagnosis and he just said quickly "I do not have one at this time" in a thick accent and just as fast went back into his office and shut the door like as though he was busy and I'd annoyed him and I was nobody. Hmmm... Well, that was borderline rude. If I was more assertive back then as I am now I would of knocked again and of said "she's been in and out of this institution for 11 to 12 years and you still don't have a diagnosis for her? Then how can you keep her here against her will??? Come on. I'm not buying it and I am a relative and she must have some rights". I still do beat myself up sometimes, when I think of it, for not being more of an activist for her. But back then I didn't even know that I could be or that I should or how even how to go about advocating for her. Plus I had my own problems. It seemed incredibly hopeless anyway. And I felt very alone with these thoughts that curled and churned my stomach and still does now that I am thinking about this ancient history of ours.

As for the visits; I did know vaguely as a young child that it was a pretty big deal for her to get to see me. Things had to be arranged. That she and the staff and perhaps her doctors had to get her mentally prepared for a visit with me and that she had to earn the "priviledge" of seeing me and get approval or permission. For her you'd think she was getting to visit her favorite movie star and for me it was incredibly ackward as of course the setting is less then desirable inside especially to a child and everyone would gawk at me as I dressed nice and that made my feel very uncomfortable and at a loss for words. I also never saw any other kids there or anyone else ever visit for that matter. Of course there was very little to talk about as she didn't know much about what was going on in the outside world or with me and my life and I didn't know much about hers. I was smart and a good observer. I figured that much out. I know she had to be "good" for quite a while thus we'd never know when we'd get to see each other again. I was indifferent. Fine with me as the long car ride each way made me carsick as did the smell of the place. I thought it was alarmingly gross then. I now have environmental illness so all smells have always been amplified to me and some make me sick and dizzy. It wasn't fun or easy. We didn't look or act anything alike so I sometimes wondered if I was really her daughter. "Cause if I really was I might turn out like her I feared. I've turned out to be more like my grandmother who loved me a lot and thought I was the best thing she ever did. She mainly took care of me. My mother said I looked just like my father who I never met. Anyway, I suppose that she was coaxed and counseled on how to behave when she saw me (which was such an emotional experience for her) so that she could be calm and not upset herself or me was probably the plan. As an adult I am now sure of it. The coming to the end of a visit in earlier years was a grave remorseful feeling for us both as it could be months before we saw each other and I didn't know if she'd live much longer staying in a bizarre, dangerous place like this. It seemed like anything could unexpectantly happen to her. She did happily tell me that sometimes someone (I guess a social worker) took her somewhere like a thrift store to get some clothes or brought her a half-way decent outfit to see me in and often times took her to get her hair done and someone sometimes would paint her nails a day or two prior to our visits and that made her feel special and excited (and others jealous). Some would try and provoke her to anger so that she could not have her visit and lose her priviledges and honor cards. I didn't even know for many years that I could even send her clothes or anything. For a long time, it never dawned on me to and she never asked. She wanted coffee and cigarettes and all of her letters mentioned how many cups of coffee and cigarettes she had had and who had given them to her and how grateful she was to of gotton them. Hmmm... what a life. She was a chain smoker, and it was a great turn off as I didn't smoke. Maybe thats why I didn't smoke. She would bend over (not squat or step on them)to scratch them out in the dirt and she never thought to keep her pants pulled up and so her butt crack would show to my disgust but I didn't say nothing. I'd never said anything to upset her until three days before her death which I regret but she deserved. She did dress poorly and I was taught to stay clean and to dress very proper. I had a very strict German-Catholic upbringing. I did send her a lavendar shorts set once and a nice long-sleeve pink nightgown but she told me they were stolen from her within a week. So that discouraged me. Christ, why keep trying. What was the point. All my efforts were useless when it came to her so I just tried eventually to excell in my own life and to push my thoughts about her away, deep down inside of myself along with my guilt. Even though I know that it was not my fault she was in there. I certainly would of liked to of known to what degree or extent geting committed was her fault. Had she committed a crime to get in there? She did get out sometimes and live at an adult home so its not like she was committed for life. I think she was even in Central Islip for a while. When I was first taken away from her we lived in my grandmothers house with her. She was completely bent over and was a very disabled diabetic with arthiritis and yet my mother was never there. I was told she attended some kind of program she stayed at each night M-F and that she could only come home on weekends. She was going to that when I was abruptly taken away from school without warning and brought to a foster home. I wish I knew what the case plan was for her and if reunification with me was ever the plan as it was never discussed with me. They must of never terminated her parental rights as I would of been put up for adoption and the visits would of ended. In those days you did not only have one year to get your act together or lose your child forever to the DSS. It was dragged out for years I heard and mine was. Maybe it would of hurt both of us too much if that ever of happened someone decided and it would of. I'm certain she would of committed suicide if our relationship was extinguished forever. Maybe her doctors and social workers thought, on and off, that she could pull herself together and maybe of gotton me back with the proper guidance if she put the effort in. But, who knows...it didn't work out. I guess that is why I am attracted to people who constantly ask for my help and have endless problems and can never get themselves together no matter how much I try and help them. I see now that they do need to help themselves, and I try only to encourage them to get their own help and not depend on me to do it for them. I've given up my codependant nature and don't try to enable or try to save them anymore. They have to save themselves or let God do it.

I am grateful to hear from you about the food thing. I really am. I always wondered about that, if what she said was true or not. I told myself over and over that they HAD to feed her, they MUST BE feeding her. Even if she was a diabetic they legally had to feed her. Right!!!?? She was over-weight and needed to diet and to be on a special diet; so I trusted their judgement as I didn't know anything about her health or diabetes at the time. But when someone pleads with you endlessly that they are starving that really gets to ya. "They're starving me, I am so hungry" she'd say. What could I do. I am surprised that I didn't become balemic (sp)or something. But I do keep a lot of food in the house so that no one can ever say that they are starving around here. Recently a disabled veteran friend full of unsolvable problems was in a recovery hospital five hours away for six weeks laid up in bed due to a painful unusual butt surgery of all things. He was adamently complaining that they were not giving him enough to eat and he could barely walk to the bathroom much less to the far away vending machine. He is a 59 yr old diabetic with a slipped disc and a heart condition who is more out of his mind then my mother ever was and can usually handle his affairs with a pounding fist and a loud outburst of temper to get what he wants. But he needed to recover and didn't want to get thrown out of there before he was healed so he bit his lip for once. But after getting only a half of a thin tuna sandwich for dinner and 12 units of fast acting insulin I told him to let me speak to the dietician when she happened to come in his room. I asked her what was going on and I threaten to order a meal from a restaurant and have it delivered to him unless they fed him adaquately and she personally went and got him some food right away. I told her that he had to have some food on hand if he got weak if his blood sugar got too low as he was not allowed to test himself anymore and I told her I'd help him sue them if the neglect continued. I sent him a big care package of ready to eat food the next day. So, seeing as it never happened again maybe I should of done the same thing for my mother. But I was 18-25 then instead of 43 so now I am much better equipped to confront people then I was then.

As for the incident with the orderly, I was 12 or 13 when that happened. I don't know that she was on the Thorazine then or before or after or if she ever was. That was heresay. I don't know where I heard it or if it was even true. I had no idea what medicines she was on if any. But I'd of liked to of known and still would. I wasn't afraid of her and she never hollared at me. I felt protected around her and only her when I visited. I knew she loved me and wasn't going to let anyone harm me in there. It was before and after I saw her that was scary. Actually I was far more afraid at the foster home where I could not escape and was hollared at unnecessarily EVERYDAY over incidental and minor things. The day in question she was unusually upset when she arrived and was later shaking and crying and that was the day she intensely said she HAD to get out of that place and begged me to help her. We'd brought thick deli tuna sandwiches with us that day and she did eat with her mouth wide open. Yuck! Her hands shook and she spilled her soda. Her finger nails were long and burnt and she could barely light a cigarette. I had to do it for her for the first time. For some reason they ended the visit real early and I think that is what set her off. Because she didn't want me to leave so soon. She'd looked forward to it for so long. It took her a while to get down there to where we visited. It was a special room on the first floor in the back. A rather large room I'd never been in before which was odd. It was not on a ward and she'd never been so late before so maybe someone had upset her upstairs. She was like 30 minutes late which I found peculiar and no one said why. We'd just always had to sit and wait till she came. Prior to that I'd never seen her do anything out of the ordinary. Not the first 5 or 6 years. A few odd things about public manners and hygiene etc but nothing like that. I did see her hollar at the black woman she discovered stripping in front of me but even then she only strongly stared at her and said "what the hell do you think your doing, get your ass out of here" and that seemed appropriate to me and still does. Looking back I wonder what was wrong with ME that I didn't say anything to the black lady. I was just paralyzed and uh simply afraid of what she might do if I attempted to get up and leave. I was shocked. I didn't know where to go either. You just can't get up and walk out as all the doors are locked and that could of made the woman more angry as she definitely wanted an audience and some attention I guess. It happened very quickly. Its not like my mother left me alone in there. The lady slipped in the moment she left to go to the bathroom. Diabetics with high sugar pee a lot I know now. The lady must of planned it. Afterwards my mom told me "nevermind these people in here, honey, there out of their minds and their jealous 'cause they don't get any visitors". A fairly sane comment. I said nothing. She took me to another room nearby then.

It is true I had no idea how she behaved when I was not around or what was required to keep her balanced and stable. But I was convinced that her living there amongst the true weirdo's was not going to restore her to sanity. Instead it made her feel even crazier I thought. Putting up with all of those odd personalities and their crap and their mood swings, and having to fight others to keep your few precious belongings is very stressful for anyone. Along with having priviledges earned and taken away and being told what and when you can eat and smoke and come and go and what you can do all day long would make any free-spirit adult snap. I know I'd snap. Although I think I'm better then most at holding my tongue and my temper, but underneath I fume for a long time and wish I could stand up to injustice and rude, controlling people as my mother could. I'd think that being in a calm, peaceful setting would of been best for her to of succeeded in amending her emotions and anger issues. I know that I couldn't of lived amongst all of those odd people and amongst all of those rules and of not blown my temper at her age. I think that that was asking a lot of her.

By the time I was old enough to help her it was true that I knew that she couldn't cope out in society for long, if at all, and I'd of had to of held her hand thru everything, and that she did have a capacity to become violent and that she had a low tolerance for putting up with peoples crap, (I've met a lot of people like that though) and also that she was now soooo accustomed to the lifestyle there. Its like being in school and you don't know how to cope with being out of high school after graduation and not seeing friends in the hallway etc. Or how a chronically homeless person cannot adjust to living in a house or keeping it up, they need to roam and can't take the stress of any household responsibilities. She had so much done for her, like all of her cooking and laundry and driving, meal planning and medication management. Staff were like her parents. By the way I heard she grew up well off as an only child with two parents and was well treated and fairly spoiled I heard from a distant cousin of mine. Her father inherited a lot of money later in life and blew it all too quick and afterwards went crazy and he spent coincidentally spent 20 years in a mental institution too. I don't know which one though, maybe it was KPPC, hmmm...??? She was, in life, primarily interested in getting and trading for cigarettes like a gambler. I heard she got a job cleaning toilets and bathrooms at one time to earn them. She could never of adjusted to outside life by the time I was 23 and I think she eventually knew and accepted that. I just personally have met many people in my life that seemed far more mentally f____ed up and violent then she was and they are free and roaming the streets and it seems so unfair. I mean in some cities you can be completely whacked and off your rocker and mask it well by being say a flamboyant artist and act as strange as they like and get away with it because there an excentric bizzare artist who stays out of legal trouble and supports themselves and have no children living with them.

Spiritually I believe now that the life she and I had we agreed to and planned to have before we were ever born so that we could learn certain lessons and to have certain experiences. That she and I chose all of this and I chose her for my mother. I believe that very evolved beings have and choose some of the more difficult paths in life in order to "feel" certain things and to have very different experiences. Just like more cultivated people will go out to eat sushi or cavier and others wouldn't desire to experience the taste of it. It is something like that. So...

If anyone knows if it is possible for me to be able to view my mothers records at KPPC or how I might be able to find copies of the court order or 2PC (that I didn't know about) that got her in there I'd like to know. To the person who responded first you sound like you worked in a professional capacity at the place so maybe you could be so kind as to answer some of these questions for me. Or is it that now that she is dead I am not able to know anything about her? It sure would help me to know my family history for my son's sake. I'd also like to know if my grand father was in there as well. It might tell of my families health history as well that I have limited knowledge of. Thanks, Shannon

I can be reached at: rainbowlight@bresnan.com (although currently my email is down so wait a couple of days until it gets fixed, ok, thanks)

KPSHMRU: 30th Aug 2010 - 21:37 GMT

Shannon,

It is always a good thing to learn the history of the treatment of mental illness. Jason is working on the history of KPSH, which I am sure will be the definitive history.

Prior to the 1800s, mental patients were usually cared for by their families, to what extent possible, or were taken in by charity hospitals or early public hospitals. Remember the times. Many cultures once consider the mentally ill to be cursed.

During the 1800s, known as "The Age of Enlightenment," when science was used to the benefit of mankind. We saw industrialization and advancement in medical sciences. It was opined that the mentally ill would be best served humanely by sending them to country locations and away from the cities. It was thought that as much sunlight as possible would help the patients, so wards and rooms were constructed with as much wall space devoted to windows as possible, most notably in dormatories and dayrooms. The patients were provided the first mental therapies, known as occupational therapy, whereby patients would do constructive work during the daytime.

Kings Park State Hospital was one of those institutions. It was truly a city in itself, virtually self-sufficient. Patients made clothing, shoes, furniture, and worked the farm fields, etc. Many outside occupations were duplicated in the hospitals. The ward personnel actually lived alongside the patients in the early buildings. The building in which I worked was constructed in about 1910 and it contained apartments where the personnel lived. The workers ate in the dining rooms with the patients. The building actually had a visitor room on both floors. The grounds of the hospital were like a park. The buildings, trees, shrubs, and lawns were well maintained, much by the patients themselves.

Something about family visits. During my entire time of working there for five years (while attending college), I can remember only about three patients on my ward who ever had a visit from a family member during that time. There were probably about ten other patients in the entire unit who ever had visits. The staff would take the patients, those not allowed passes, out for walks around the grounds in groups. We would take them on van trips all over Long Island, just for a change of scenery.

Surely, the hospital was a different place than what it became during the 1970s with all the budget cuts. The taxpayer money was going elsewhere. The staffing ratios were difficult to maintain. The worst thing to happen to the patients, besides de-institutionalization, in my opinion, was the court system disallowing patients to work for anything less than minimum wages. This completely killed meaningful occupational therapy. The taxpayers certainly not afford to pay that to many thousands of patients per institution. Most patients were then left to linger on the wards all day. Sad.

De-institutionalization has been a grand failure, but that is a topic for another posting.

Chris in South Portland, Maine: 2nd Sep 2010 - 00:31 GMT

Shannon and KPSHMRU have led this website to an amazing and distinctive archive of KPPC. Their memories and contributions will help me and others better understand this huge place. The exhaustive contribution Shannon has made and the literal, articulate, follow-up documentation provided by KPSHMRU are invaluable. Thank you both so much for taking the time to write your thoughts and express your feelings and knowledge here. Thank you for bringing a more accurate picture of what this psychiatric center was really all about during its most active time. With clairvoyance, I can feel so much coming from KPPC, and hearing the actual stories from contributors helps me better grasp what I am picking up from the place. Again, thank you for this amazing and growing archive, which now has historical significance, in my opinion. Also, any upcoming book being created and written about the history of KPPC will doubtless be excellent. Sincerely from, Chris in South Portland, Maine.

Jason aka Nightraven: 2nd Sep 2010 - 22:53 GMT

Wow... I see you guys have been busy during my vacation to Florida. I have a lot to talk about. Where to begin?
Shannon, after reading your very long and fascinating thoughts about your memories of your mother and the KPPC I am greatly intrigued by you. I can only imagine what your childhood must have been like living in foster care and only seeing your mother on occasions in a mental ward of all places. The things you must have seen are things no child even things of. The anticipation of the long ride going there or the contemplation on your experiences during the long ride back home must have been enough to change the way you think about life.
It’s so sad when a kid can’t live what so many people consider a normal life. However, like you said it is what builds character. You learned at an early age that life isn’t always like the fairy tales we read about when growing up. Life is filled with pain and suffering and through those awful experiences we grow into tougher people. Well, most of us do. There are some who unfortunately cannot deal with it and break down. Some are able to recover and come back stronger than before, while others never come back from that hardened path and are lost forever until they eventually die a sad lonely death.
I have been deeply touched by your life and your relationship with your mother. I feel like I just read an autobiography where it covered your youth, teenage years, college life, and then the adulthood until you became a mother and finally took the time to look back on your life. I almost feel like I know you.
I have always been close to my mother, so I feel for you to not have known that closeness that I’ve experienced. So many people take for granted the little things in life that others never get to know. I learned a long time ago to appreciate every thing in your life because it will not always be the same. Things are always changing around us and sometimes we have no control over it. We have to learn to cope and deal with the changes no matter how good or bad they are.
It’s great that after so many years of keeping those feelings inside you felt you could open up here and pour it all out. It is very healthy to do things like that. You should never have had to grow up like that without being able to talk to someone about how you felt. It’s not good to keep such intense feelings bottled up and never be able to talk about it with anyone. I don’t mean you needed a psychiatrist, but rather someone you could have felt comfortable talking to... like a parent. You were robbed of that at an early age and apparently the foster parents weren’t much help at all. I wish you could have had a better life, but as you said this life has made you into a better person. Still, I wish you could have had a happier childhood living with your mother and grandmother. It doesn’t hurt to wish, but unfortunately it also doesn’t make things any better nor does it take away the pain.
I can see how your mother might have felt comfortable being at the hospital for the same reasons you stated. It is hard for one to adjust to living on the outside after being locked away somewhere for too long. It happens with people when they get out of long prison stays. Ultimately, some of them end up committing crimes just so they can go back to the only home they know. It’s sad, but often the case. Times change too often and if you are not living on the outside, where you can adjust accordingly you find yourself totally lost. It can be quite scary to some.
I have always lived my life watching and learning from other people. I watch closely the mistakes they make in life and learn not to do the same. I suppose I have always thought of studying people as a pet project of mine. I have always been aware that I do it for as long as I can remember. I can recall as a child looking at things my relatives would do and thinking I won’t make the same mistakes when I get older. I still have not. I stick to my guns when I decide on something. I am a very stubborn person, which is what makes it so easy for me to be that way. I learned long ago not to do drugs, not to smoke cigarettes, not to drink alcohol to the point of being a drunken fool, not to commit crimes, and not to abuse people. I was raised right by my parents.
When I had my first taste of what it felt like to be a victim of a crime it only pissed me off. I wasn’t even the victim. My friend was, but I was right next to him when some group of older kids led by a little twerp stole his new sneakers in the subway station while leaving JHS. I think that experience is what really made me want to become a cop. I never wanted anyone to make me into a victim. I became a NYC police officer in 1991. I have been one for almost 20 years. I always treat people courteously and with respect, as I was raised by my parents to do. That includes my prisoners, who I usually have a good relationship with by the time its time to transport them to see the judge at Central Bookings in Manhattan.
I became interested in KPPC because on my off time I like to go ghost hunting. I have always been fascinated by the paranormal. When I heard about the abandoned KPPC it sounded like a great place to explore. However, I never go into someplace new without doing some research first. Lucky that I did because I learned about the asbestos, lead, and weakened conditions of some of these buildings. I have Sean Hopkins blogs here and Sean Hardy’s website to thank for that.
The more I learned about the hospital the more fascinated I became. It became much more to me than just a place for adventure seeking. It had a history to it and I wanted to know more about it. I wanted to know about the patients and the workers. I wanted to know about the different buildings. I wanted to know how people felt living near it. I decided to write a book about it and have since been in contact with some very helpful individuals such as KPSHMRU. He has been an invaluable asset to my research and self-education about the KPPC. I have also gone to the Kings Park Heritage Museum, where the volunteers there have also been great in helping me out.
I know you have a lot of frustration inside you because of how your mother had to live her life. You should never blame yourself, though. She lived her life and dealt with what came her way. Maintaining a relationship with you is what kept her strong. I know you must have been her guiding light and she was grateful for every chance she had to spend with you. You did your part by visiting her as often as your life permitted. You had to build your own life, though. You couldn’t be there for her as much as you would have liked. It was just not possible at the time. Never blame yourself for what you could have done or should have done. You did what you could and in your mother’s eyes I am sure it was more than good enough.
The important thing about having your mother in your life is cherishing the memories of her when she is gone. You have memories of her. True, some are not so good, but the same can be said for anyone who lives their whole life with their mother. There will always be bad memories. You learn what you can from them and set them aside to make room for the good memories.
You were a good daughter. I am sure you are a good mother based on the life experiences you have learned from. It sounds like you grew into a very special person and I feel honored that you shared your life with us. Thank you for that.
I will contact you on your email address soon. I will a while as you suggested. Do you think I might be able to use some of what you wrote for the book I am doing? I can leave out names to make it anonymous if you’d like. I am very interested in using detailed accounts of patient experiences for my book. I have plenty of good stories from former workers, but hardly any from former patients. Your story is an even better perspective being from a child’s point of view looking in from the outside. That could make for a very interesting segment in the book. If you want I could even post the photo of you and her as you mentioned. I could use your names or not. It’s up to you. If you rather I don’t use anything that’s fine, too. I don’t want to exploit your story or anything. I am simply trying to tell the story of KPPC from all sides. I want to be as completely fair and accurate as possible. I want to do this place and everyone who was ever there as a worker, resident, patient, or visitor some justice.
A special thanks to Sean for allowing us to all communicate on his blog and for the editors at City Noise for not shutting us down. I feel this blog is very important to many people for many reasons and I hope it goes on for years to come.

KPSHMRU: 3rd Sep 2010 - 12:48 GMT

A compendium of daily life in the hospital might be in order, just to provide an idea of how life was for patients and staff. I cannot get into the minds of the patients, but can describe some of them by their behaviors, which were as varied as the personalities of the staff.

This might be a project that I will need to write offline and past it into a post or e-mail it to Jason. I am pretty backed up by work right now (not a bad thing, considering the state of the economy), so I hope to scratch out some words in the very near future.

Jason aka Nightraven: 3rd Sep 2010 - 22:59 GMT

That would be great if you could get it done in time for my book. No pressure.

I still have a lot of work to gather together. I am guessing it will be ready for a publisher by next summer. I am not trying to rush it, but I do have a lot of information already. I still need certain things that I'd like to use. Once I get that, then I will see about putting it all together.

I am doing this book in segments. I have each part separate and when it is done I will put it all together and then add the photos where appropriate. I want to use a lot of photos (both color and black and white).

Cathy: 5th Sep 2010 - 14:23 GMT

I was at KPPC yesterday - I felt very bad vibes at the surgery building - something very bad happened there -- I went there to walk no birds or animals at all - i think they are scared of all the bad vibes there -

KPSHMRU: 6th Sep 2010 - 11:15 GMT

Cathy,

Are you talking about Bldg. 7 or Bldg. 136? The latter held the med-surg unit until the former was built in the 1960s. The nearest hospital to Kings Park for many years was Huntington Hospital. It made sense to construct a med-surg unit at KPSH as the population grew there. Bldg. 7 also held the geriatric wards and morgue/mortuary. I can understand if you felt "vibes" there.

I would not doubt that there were deaths in virtually all units of the hospital over the years. I remember at least two patients that died in the MR Unit while I worked there. I also know of three from elsewhere that died in the Nissequoge River after they took a rental boat at The Bluff.

shannon: 6th Sep 2010 - 23:12 GMT

Hi. This is in response to Jason AKA Nightravens comment to my post.
It is long so no one else has to read it.

Thanks for your heartfelt thoughts Jason. But for the record I did not write the post as much of a benefit to me. I did it to expose a side of KPPC that seemed to be missing so as then to expose more of the truth of the place that there seems to finally be an appetite for and for others to get a rare indepth look at the place from a visiting childs eyes in order to understand some of the suffering that went on there that they may experience now intuitively when they walk around visiting there today. And also so that they might at least ponder about how things could of been done differently, and thus how it can maybe be done differently in the future. We must always look to the past to understand how to build a better tommorrow. I hope that by writing what I did that citizens of the world can see that a lot of sorrow could of been spared if things had been done at least a little differently and that they might want to stand up and speak out so as to prevent any such injustice from occurring in the future. I think that if I went out there today I would just sit out in the field and just cry for a while for all of those who were forced to live there for so long and for their being confined and forgotton it seems. They all just wanted to be loved and cared for and free. KPPC probably affected me so deeply as I've found that I am a "sensitive" person meaning that I can "feel" others feelings and then they affect me on a very deep level. I can also intuite a lot from this and tell you a lot of things (but I usually keep this info to myself and don't do it for profit). I can remember the eyes and intense stares of those looking out of the barred windows as I'd leave and I could feel what they felt and some of what they were thinking and it always felt to me as though they desparately wanted to talk to a visitor (as apposed to someone who worked there), so as to tell them their thoughts and their feelings about their strong desire to leave and about the great injustice they felt they were enduring as though we could help them. (I believe that when many of them died they stayed in that same state and so all of you visitors are feeling their feelings they had when they died now.) And those were the thoughts I took with me on the car ride home; their lack of hope and their dulled steadfast endurance. Basically I realized I could not really help others, even though I wanted to, or myself and I had little faith in this so called God who was supposed to help as I had already found as a child that he had failed in helping so many others including myself, while so many others were so blessed I saw living in the Hamptons of Long Island. I got the feeling as a child from visiting their and in my own life that life was unfair to some, and very fair to others, like the caste system, as some people have to live lives they'd rather not and others were living on top of the world in lavish luxury. (I was later a nanny or a babysitter in many of these fine Hampton's homes. Talk about contrast.). I really identified with Anne Frank after reading her diaries as a child. I stayed strong and tenacious and did not give up on hope and she did not either.

Well getting back, yes to write it was a bit therapuetic I must say and it has opened up a lot of old wounds of mine that did lie dormat. I think it would of been better for me if they'd of stayed in dormacy actually as this has been a terribly emotional experience for me that I seem now more and more drawn to write about. I must say recalling all of this and writing these words makes me sick at times and nauseated, and trembling as it strikes me so very deeply. I haven't thought of any of this in years and am realizing I certainly have some unresolved issues. But it was hardly an autobiography as I only scratched the surface. An autobiography of mine I believe would really be interesting as it has been so different of a journey then I've heard the average person generally experiences. I've never met or heard of anyone who grew up in foster care whose parent was in a psychiatric hospital for many years. A life at KPPC may of been difficult for her and for me, but to be honest living at the foster home was far more difficult. I've always said that if I visited that place I'd need a fifth of vodka before I go and I don't even drink! I recall each visit to see my mom was always followed by the foster mother being extremely ticked off at me for nothing I could figure I'd done. Or she'd invent something and I'd have to defend my innocense. I felt that she resented that I had a mother and that their was love between us, but it was never discussed. She treated me the worse and more was expected of me, probably because she was jealous of me as my foster father was "too fond" of me and she must of known it. It was obvious. I was pretty, and responsible and perserverant and very good down deep to the core of me and it disgusted her as it did many of the other twisted foster mothers I had. Not only was I like a mother to my own mother but also to the younger foster children. I was always trying to keep them out of trouble as best I could and she hated that also. I couldn't bear watching them get their asses beat or their head slammed into the wall or their fingers burnt or eating soap for usually no good reason and oftentimes said I did something they did and took their punishment for it so that they did not get the beatings, as they were so little and they could not take it I thought. It was a painstaking job of trying to teach them how they were expected to behave and act in a strict German home as they weren't as smart as I was to remember it all from moment to moment and they resisted my instructions sometimes and I'd have to watch them endure their dreadful punishment. We weren't even allowed to watch tv something as simple and easy as no tv was not an opiton. I mean I used to tell my friends in college that I grew up in something like a German Hitler Nazi Concentra-tion camp. We were unloved slave-laborers that brought in an income. You were constantly scrutized and had to be careful of everything you said or did. Believe it or not those foster parents now live in a million dollar home in the Hamptons of Long Island and are held in high esteem by their church and community as those nice people who took in all of those poor foster kids (who they consistantly tormented and abused). Taking in six foster kids for many years turned out to be quite profitable for them as we did a lot of work to improve their home for them. For the record most of the handmade gifts my mother made me in her art classes the foster mother eventually made me take and throw out into the garbage outside personally as some kind of a sick punishment for I guess having any feelings for my mother I suppose or to send me the message that she'd rather that things were dead between us. I should of turned out mentally ill afer all that I endured while growing up but I did not. I must of taken after my father whoever he was. I just know his name and that he was a Merchant Marine around the time that Pearl Harbor was invaded. I believe that if I did write an autobiography that it would not be a bore, as mine has been full of great personal challenges, and obstacles and dangerous risks and adversity and of great sorrow and also of great passion and love and unusual experiences. (I've been stalked a lot over the years). I think that seeing all that I have seen especially as a child has enabled me to develop great compassion and empathy for others that I find that some of those that have led more of a priviledged life sadly do not have. And they are unfortunately the ones mainly in the decision making positions that affect our world and our lives.

As for, as you said, I should just remember the fond memories I have of my mother. Ha! Sadly, there really aren't any. Just her laughter and that people liked her a lot. She had a merry spirit. KPPC could of done a better job of creating better memories I think and that is what I've been trying to say. I mean she never had a birthday party that I recall. I guess I have thought for years what is the point of even thinking about it, its sad and it is in the past. Also until now no one has wanted to hear about it. I guess the reason I felt I should bring it up now is as people are visiting KPPC (more probably after its been shut down then when it was open) and are thinking about the place and its past they could see some of what was done wrong and not do it again. Like those in positions of planning future mental patients futures. If you are clairvoyant as am I'm sure you'd hear their souls crying out "why were we forgotton", "why were we ostrisized by society", "why were we loved any less for being who we were". I mean who decides what is fit, a judge who has probably never set foot in a mental institution to judge it. I think today things are different as we are being forced to approach things differently. We are starting to accept each others differences and are calling it individua-lity and are embracing uniqueness and diversity and oddness as blossoming into your true self or as being artistically revered. I mean so many kids are now being born with or develop autism and down syndrome or are bipolar or have a personality disorders and they are being praised and loved by their parents and are being intergrated into society and luckily NOT locked up in institutions and are getting a chance to have a life out in the world and without being looked down upon (by many but not all). Today it is like we see that the way they are is of no fault of their own and that they should get to enjoy life and they are not being punished for being who they are or robbed of having a life in the free world.

I have come to believe that a lot of mental illness is due to events in ones life (or a series of) that has led to depression and/or anger for (such as) not being able to express themselves or not being able to be heard or from being misunderstood or from not being loved or not feeling like they could live up to someones elses expectations or for not feeling like they had a fair chance or from feeling that they have failed others or themselves or from mental, physical and sexual abuse and low self esteem. I don't think that most people are born mentally ill unless they are bipolar as that is usually inherited.

As for me I would of had a better life if my mother could of had a better life. That's how I feel and I believe it to be true. But I never felt that it was my fault. I didn't blame myself for her being in there as I truely had nothing to do with it. My mother was in there from 1972 to 1996 on and off, but mainly there and that was the time of the budget cuts and when the place was really sliding down hill; where few seemed to care. Basically I believe that those people felt forgotton and unloved and felt as though they did not have much hope if any and that is whats incredibly sad. And what's worse is that few even gave it much thought until now. My mother did have relatives and I finally found them and talked to them a few years ago. She had cousins and aunts. Most of them have since died and I only talk to my one cousin who is the only one who is now still alive I think. I asked her why no one ever visited or why no one tried to get me out of the foster care. Well she said that they were busy working and that they didn't have time and that they were told that we were happy where we were at. Wow what a shocker! Some social worker that worked for the state must of told them that. Hmmmmm....... That made my blood boil as it was the furthest thing from the truth. The lies of social workers. I knew it was true too. The first lie I heard from a social worker was when I was first taken away from my family without warning from school. I was told that we were only going out to get an ice cream cone and then I would be brought home. We got the ice cream but we did not turn around. He took and dumped me off at the foster home where a few ladies were speaking German. I was bewildered and perplexed. He never told me why I was going to stay there or for how long or anything. (For all I knew I could of been kidnapped) Just goodbye. Even a seven year old deserves an explaination. After that I did not see or speak to my mother for six months and I never saw or spoke to my beloved sick grandmother again until just before her death in a nursing home about five years later. I never got any of my things accept what was in my school desk or saw our house again until long after college. It, I heard, was auctioned off years before for the back taxes owed on it. I guess I came to the planet to experience loss I decided later on and to experience the opposite of love for alot of years. For the record I saw children treated far worse in foster care then I ever saw anyone treated at the mental hospital. I can honestly say I never saw any of them being physically harmed or emotionally mistreated, only hearsay. I certainly cannot say that for foster care; it was quite the opposite actually and they call it being placed in "protective custody"; what a JOKE ! ! ! I was far more protected by my ailing, kind, mentally stable grandmother.

In response to your comment, I would not say that I have a lot of frustration inside of me due to my inability to help my mother, not now. I did back then, 15 to 35 years ago. Now I am at peace with it overall as I know she's in a much better place. As soon as she died I fairly quickly became at peace with it. A couple days before she died I was frustrated with her for not ever telling me the truth about my estranged father. I'd asked her many times and she'd not lie, but avoid the subject. Perhaps feeling threatened that I might find him and forsake her. I got upset with her for this for the first time in my life and told her I would not send her any more care packages or do anything more to help her unless she told me the truth right now. She did not wish to talk about it still. Instead she spoke of her chronic unhappiness. I asked her what would make her happy and she said to be living back with her mommy and daddy. Hmm.. Geeezzz... Christ, why did she always have to ask for the impossible, as I cannot fulfill that wish. So that night, as I was feeling frustrated and upset for losing my cool with her I was stood in the kitchen at the counter and tried to relax and began thinking intently upon what she had said. About ten minutes later I felt a comforting spirit descending down from above to my left side. I actually felt the pressure of her reasuring hand on my left shoulder and she gently said "let me take this burden out (or off) of your hands". It was distinct and lasted about four seconds. I wasn't scared at all but I've been well trained on the ways of spirits. It was, without a doubt, my grandmother Marys' spirit. I knew it as it felt like her and low and behold my mother died the next I believe. So I knew she went to a good place. It was exactly what I needed to have; such a great burden lifted off of me to someone who I believe could actually help take care of her and it is what my mother actually wanted and so that is why I refer to it as a beneficial death, in case anyone was wondering. I believe that when we die we are greeted by out loved ones (if we have any) and that we then feel no pain if we choose to go to the light and on to heaven and elsewheres. We were a close family at one time (torn apart)and my mother was very well taken care of by my once affluent grandparents until I heard my grandfather blew all their inherited winfall and later went crazy. I heard that my mother had been spoiled and had never really held a job as she was accustomed to being taken care of as a child and an adolescent. So I'm sure that made it hard for all of them to go from living well to being chronically on welfare. My grandmother had severe physical disabilty but no mental illness that I am aware of. She thought I was the best thing my mother had ever done. But she was really too sick with arthritis and diabetes to take care of me. She was completely bent over. Our house was very unkept, with little food and no flushing toilets or transportation. I can remember nuns bringing boxes of food to our house and my being in awe of it and incredibly grateful. I used to play with large goverment bags of uncooked rice and make mud cakes out of them in the side of the yard. I spent a lot of time alone. We were incredibly poor thats for sure, but I didn't know the difference at the time as I'd never been to anyone elses home for comparison. My mom literally took me food shopping or to the doctor in a little red wagon. I had one good orange dress I really loved with white trim and a colorful elastic band in the middle I missed when I left. I stopped going to school as I had nothing good enough to wear other then that dress. Eventually truancy officers came to the house and my mother told ME to answer the door while she hid in the closet. (Dumb move I thought). Not long after I was taken away from school as the school nurse had taken an interest in me and I suppose that she reported me to the authorities. But I did feel like that was my fault as when the social worker asked me about my homelife I innocently answered his questions truthfully. I did beat myself up for that. My mother had not taught me to lie about that and so I must of said the wrong answers and won myself a childhood commital to foster care. My grandmother must of been so upset when I suppose someone told her I was not going to ever return to the home. How inhumanely cruel for them to of not let me ever see her until just before her death five years later. Everyone said that she waited to see me before she died as she died the next day. Someone told me that some people do that. She was very yellow from liver disease and she was very lucid as she could hardly tell me and my mother apart. Oh man, I think that after reliving all of this I need to go into therapy.....or that maybe this is the cheap inexpensive alternative to therapy. I can just barely handle remembering so much sorrow we all endured. Maybe now I can actually allow myself to feel the sorrow as back then as a girl I had fairly paralyzed emotions. They were all falling apart around me and I so I felt I needed to stay strong for them. I am now reading an old book called The Hurried Child that tells the effects on a child that grows up too fast or hurried as I did. I really didn't have time for a childhood once I turned seven. Before that it was carefree as my grand mother let me do whatever I wanted. Not like she could of stopped me as she was completely bent over and could hardly walk from her downstairs bed to the stopped-up toilet thru the kitchen and back. I never remember her ever leaving the house or ever showering or bathing as it was upstairs. She did give me a nice handmade Raggetty Ann stuffed doll when she died. Two actually matching. One was small and tiny and one was large I think to resemble me and her together as we always were long ago, but my mother insisted on keeping one and I never got it back. She and her argued about it as though my mother was jealous that her mother was giving me the gift instead of to her. I think that my grandmother liked me better then her now and that my mother was never too happy about that and was a bit jealous. Who knows. So....

Well I will stop now as my son desparately wants to get on and play his computer games. He really has no idea how good a life he has. None! As what I experienced is nothing that he can ever imagine. Although we have been thru a lot together and I can see his own issues forming from events that were beyond of my control or his. I hope that he can maintain mentally stability and attain peace, love and personal freedom in his colorful and fun life.

As for contributing to the book I think I would be okay with that, but in which context I will have to give some thought. You can contact me by email. I realize I posted my email address inaccurately. It is: rainbowlight@bresnan.net not .com Thanks, Shannon

cathy: 7th Sep 2010 - 00:27 GMT

I know what i felt and it was terror --walking around i really felt fear in one building in particular - i dont know the number - i just know i felt eyes on me and i felt the fear -------many horrible things happened there,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,i saw surgery on the building -dasterdly deeds = horrific = beyond

KPSHMRU: 7th Sep 2010 - 18:03 GMT

Shannon,

From reading your last post, it seems to me that society was trying to help you all along. You did not start off in a stable home, by any means. You mentioned that your grandfather "went crazy" and lost all of his money. Your grandmother even stopped bathing and could not keep up the condition of the house due to, you mentioned, liver disease and severe arthritis. Your mother seemed to have been unable to care for you properly. It does not seem, by your post, that she even held a job. Your family was obviously on government assistance during your childhood, which at that time, was likely Social Security, food stamps, welfare, food bank, etc. or a combination thereof. Did someone else deliver the food to the home?

What might have happened if the school nurse had not notified authorities about your condition? It did not seem that your mother had the capability of caring for the family. She even hid in a closet when authorities came to check on your condition. Do you truly believe that your life would have been better had you been left in that home in that condition? If nobody there was able to get you off to school in the morning, could they have even been able to feed and clothe you properly?

This is a free society, so allowing the government, a proxy of the people, to take someone out of that condition and make them wards of the state is not taken lightly. Your mother became a ward of the state in that she was unable to care for herself, much less care for you. You became a defacto, but not true, ward of the state when you were sent to a foster home. I suppose that there were no extended family relatives that wanted to help you, either. No foster parents ever became rich from taking children into their homes. You could have been adopted by a family instead of going to a foster family, but that option was virtually impossible without consent of parents.

Think about this rationally. Do you think you could have survived in your family home at that age? If it was not for the people of NY state, your outcome might have been drastically different. No life is ever perfect, not even those of the rich people out in the Hamptons.

I had a friend in the neighborhood when I was a kid. Richie was always a little "off." When talking to him, his eyes always drifted away. His father worked as a machinist at Grumman and seemed to be a hard working, quiet man. His mother, however, was off in left field. Every time I saw her, she was always dressed in a housecoat. I never saw her outside the house. The father did all of the shopping. As an elementray school kid, I always thought this behavior was odd.

Well, one day during recess while in 6th Grade, Richie and another kid, who also had odd tendencies, just walked away from the playground at RJO. I last saw them heading for the woods, which was not unusual because we kids were always exploring. However, they disappeared for days. They were finally located by the police in Manhattan.

That was the start of psychiatric care for both of them. I do not know what became of Joe. Richie drifted away from treatment and into drugs. He departed this world a long time ago.

The bottom line is that people with mental illness severe enough to make it impossible for them to cope with life cannot be left to their own devices. Society has decided this from compassion. Reading the medical and social histories of patients in a psychiatric hospital can be quite eye-opening.

Jason aka Nightraven: 12th Sep 2010 - 20:21 GMT

Shannon, I agree with some of what KPPCMRU said about the state doing what it did for your own good. You were just a young girl and not going to school was only going to hurt your future one way or another. The way they went about it was wrong and coldhearted, though. Not letting you have contact with your grandmother until she was at death’s door was cruel. It was also very unfortunate that you ended up in a shitty foster home. However, with you being out of school, your grandmother being sick, and your mother being the way she was it could have been bad for you in the long run to remain with them.
I’ve seen so many poor households decay and fall apart while working as a police officer in Harlem. The conditions in which some kids are forced to grow up with are terrible. Unfortunately, we can’t choose our upbringing as kids. We deal with whatever is dealt our way in the best way we can.
While growing up I’ve even seen members of my own family go through similar hard times. Sometimes you do what you can to help out and other times the person going through the hardships often allows their pride to get in the way and refuses to ask for help from other family members. They don’t want to be a burden on anyone and think they can handle their own problems. I am like that myself, so I can understand. Very often things go on without anyone knowing the actual situation until it is too late.
Had you stayed with your mother and grandmother your future could have been quite different indeed. You would have been less educated than you are now. You would have still been forced to grow up fast because eventually taking care of the family would have fallen upon you. Your mother was already passing responsibility to you by making you open the door when they came knocking to find out why you hadn’t gone to school.
Don’t get me wrong I am not trying to badmouth your mother at all. I am simply making an observation based on what you wrote. As I said I’ve seen many things in my time as a cop. I believe that pretty much qualifies me to make observations based on the facts and what is known about a situation.
It is a damn shame how things were done. Taking you out of school to remove you from their custody was stupid. It could have been done in a more subtle way while at home so you could gather up some belongings and say goodbye to your family. You also should have been allowed visitation rights with them. The state should have done better checks on the foster family to make sure all of the foster kids in their care were doing well. There are so many things that were done wrong, but to talk about it now doesn’t really accomplish anything. What’s done is done.
I can see how you can perceive being in foster care to be far worse than being at a mental asylum. That seemed to be the case with you. I am sure your mother wasn’t doing too badly at the hospital. At least not as bad as a patient who was locked up in isolation or constantly strapped down for everyone’s safety. Most of the time those were the patients who were in need of such care. Not all the time, though. I know for a fact that in the past and still to this day many people are institutionalized wrongly. In those cases it is only a normal reaction to resist that confinement and end up being strapped down.
While doing research for the book I am writing I have come across some very interesting stories about patients who did not belong at KPPC. Do you know in the past people would be institutionalized because of depression, such as one who takes too long to mourn for a dead relative? Some were institutionalized for being promiscuous, while others were locked away for simply being alcoholics. Times have changed a lot since the early days of the hospital thankfully.
Your mother probably didn’t need to be placed in an asylum, especially for as long as she was there. Medication could have helped her in many ways had medicine been more advanced back then. It is unfortunate that the rest of your family didn’t do more to make sure you were in good hands.
All that can be done now is to find ways to deal with all of these feelings you have around inside you regarding your mother, your upbringing, and the hospital. I can tell you definitely do not need psychiatric help. You seem to be a very rational person. You just need a way to let out those feelings so they can finally be dealt with. If that means writing them out here and venting, then so be it. I am sure we will help you in anyway we can to cope with it and get through it.
I am a good listener and I usually give good advice. My fellow associate, KPPCMRU, is also a very helpful person, so I am sure he doesn’t mind being here to listen to you. He’s been very helpful to me in writing my book. If you ever need to vent feel free to do so. We will not judge you. I can only hope everyone else who reads your story will think similarly and can be as supportive.
I will send you an email. I had sent one to the other email address you posted earlier. I will resend that to the new one you posted.

Jason aka Nightraven: 13th Sep 2010 - 09:33 GMT

Oh, sorry... I meant I agree with KPSHMRU. I am not used to referring to it as KPSH. To me it was KPPC since I've first heard about it. It has had so many names over the years.

I was just working on a chapter in my book when it was just the Kings County Farm. Those seemed like such simpler days. The patients were actually happy. It was the early days of occupational therapy when patients were allowed to work the farm. They had a purpose in life that wasn't limited to being confined to a patient ward staring at a TV, while under medication. It's such a shame things had to change for the worse.

KPSHMRU: 15th Sep 2010 - 12:25 GMT

I seem to recall that the government, state and/or federal, as result of a lawsuit, was forced to pay patients minimum wages for any work performed at the hospitals. That would have bankrupted the budget.

Even though the farms, orchards, and livestock farm were closed as food was procured cheaper from elsewhere, the hospital had numerous shops on the grounds. Think of these: tailor, shoe, industrial, plumbing, groundskeeping, carpentry, furniture, etc. Most of the work was done by patients as part of occupational therapy. Again, the courts killed it.

Jason aka Nightraven: 24th Nov 2010 - 02:25 GMT

I went back to the KPPC and checked out a few different buildings. I went into the underground tunnels, as well. I managed to get some video done inside of Buildings 136 and 137, and then in the underground tunnels beneath Building 136 heading towards Building 138. I took a lot of pictures of those buildings and of the buildings of Group 2.

I plan to head back to KPPC during the daytime for some more photos in December, which I will post on the website for my upcoming book. I posted some of the videos on my website if you want to check them out, Sean or Barry. You guys should already have the link. I am not allowed to post it here. Anyone else interested will have to contact me.

Jason aka Nightraven: 28th Nov 2010 - 07:15 GMT

I was checking one of the videos I made in Building 136, again, because I believe there is an orb moving through at one point. However, this time I noticed ominous music playing towards the end of the video. I didn't notice it the first time I watched it. It is very low, but definitely music. It sounds like music from a horror movie. It comes in after about 2 min. 17 sec. The orb is before that after a minute and a half. I posted the video on YouTube as KPPC~Building 136 (Orb & EVP) or you can check out my other videos under my user name Valen213. Not sure if this post will remain here for long, so hurry. If I could post the video here I would.

SceneGonePhotographer: 29th Nov 2010 - 22:14 GMT

Hi, I need entries into 93 and 122. Also, the tunnels. I go almost every weekend ever since I had a dream I was murdered in the tunnels. Please email me anything you know at MiaDentici@gmail.com, thanks so much!

Jason aka Nightraven: 5th Dec 2010 - 10:18 GMT

That's a pretty interesting dream you've had about being murdered in the tunnels. It makes me wonder why you'd even want to go there and tempt fate. Do you think that is wise? I do not.

Building 93 is currently sealed up good from what I saw the last time I was there. I suggest walking around the building in search of an open window. There are always new openings made by desperate people. I never make my own. I use the ones available to me or I move on to someplace else. However, due to the cold weather I doubt new entrances have been made since my recent visit a few weeks ago. It might be best to wait for warmer weather.

Building 122 is not sealed up because it is falling apart. You can walk in the front door, but at your own peril. You will surely die if you are not careful in there. The ceiling is collapsing onto the floors below. It is highly unsafe and not worth the risk. It is actually on a list of buildings to be demolished. It is extremely dangerous to walk around inside of this building.

The tunnels are not accessible through either of these buildings. The door under 93 leading to the tunnels is welded shut. The tunnels under 122 are practically at risk of being buried under rubble and they are far too narrow and unstable to walk through. There are entrances into the tunnels that are accessible through other buildings such as from the Quad or Group 4's Building 41, Building 29 or the power plant, Building 35 behind Building 90, Buildings 136 and Building 138 of the Veteran's group, and several scattered entrances across the grounds such as well houses and manholes.

Note that you will require an asbestos protection mask to walk around inside of the buildings or in the tunnels or you will definitely stand a high risk of getting lung cancer. That will make your dream come true to a certain extent when you die because you went into the tunnels without protection. Do not go alone either.

I hope I have been helpful to you. Let me know how things turn out. Try not to get yourself killed doing something stupid.

Jason aka Nightraven: 5th Dec 2010 - 10:21 GMT

OOPS! Sorry, I meant Building 37 behind Building 90. I just noticed I typed 35. My mistake. Building 35 is actually between Buildings 3 and 36 close to Building 1.

Jordan: 9th Dec 2010 - 01:07 GMT

Hey guys
I really appreciate all the detailed stories and experiences you all had at Kings Park.
Me and my friend have exhausted almost all Connecticut abandoned hospitals ( Fairfield Hills, Seaside, Norwich.. ) and we are interested in driving alittle further for more places..
This place looks enormous( according to google earth and your pictures )
I am wondering if it is 100% "illegal" to JUST walk the grounds. Me and my friend most likely dont have enough courage to go into the depths of this place, to respect many things..
If the place is "okay"( according to the security gaurds ) just to walk around and take pictures. Thanks
It really angers me to see all the graffiti like "f*ck the police, like this was going to keep me out" because it gives us photographers a shitty reputation.
thankyou
jordan
p.s feel free to look at my Seaside and Fairfield Hills photo albums
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2074855&id=1087440534&l=f997eb64ca
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2075086&id=1087440534&l=8a0309ae31

Jason aka Nightraven: 12th Dec 2010 - 09:27 GMT

Hey, Jordan... most of the KPPC property is actually located on NYS Parks Department property and it is okay to wander around during the daytime, as long as you stay out of the buildings. You are permitted to park your car on the grounds, walk around, and take photographs during the day up until dusk. Most state parks close at dusk, which is around 6pm.

Now, if you venture onto the grounds at night that is when you will be stopped. There is a private security that patrols and likes to park in dark spots where they cannot be seen easily. The local towns police also patrol the area and will respond if the alarm system of Building 7 goes off. The NYS Parks Police has jurisdiction on the state park side and the state troopers will also drive through usually on a weekend. I suggest going on a weeknight when the security is lighter.

It is a very large amount of property to explore at a little over 873 acres of land with about 60 abandoned buildings left standing. It has a fascinating history and 7 miles worth of underground tunnels. The architecture is really nice, too. You can definitely find some good photo ops.

Good luck!

Jason aka Nightraven: 12th Dec 2010 - 09:30 GMT

By the way, Jordan... great pics at those other two hospitals.

Jason aka Nightraven: 12th Dec 2010 - 09:31 GMT

These are some photos I took at the KPPC. Enjoy.

http://kppcajourneythroughhistory.webs.com/apps/photos/album?albumid=9789732

Jason aka Nightraven: 12th Dec 2010 - 09:37 GMT

This is a photo I took, which I used for a T-Shirt.

[IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/mb1lb9.jpg[/IMG]

Jason aka Nightraven: 12th Dec 2010 - 09:38 GMT

http://i52.tinypic.com/mb1lb9.jpg

That is the link for the same pic.

Chris aka Remorseless: 19th Dec 2010 - 05:07 GMT

I want to talk to more people who have had dreams about the place.Six full years of dreaming about this hospital and for the fucking life of me i can't understand why.

Jason aka Nightraven: 20th Dec 2010 - 19:08 GMT

Chris, have you ever been there before? If so, then I can understand the dreams. The place does leave its impact on you. Ever since I first learned of it I have become obsessed with learning more to the point where I am now writing a book on it.

I've been there numerous times, have hundreds of pics and videos of the place, and a vast amount of historical data. I also am in touch with former workers, who have been very helpful to me in providing detailed stories of their own memories. I am even in touch with the daughter of a former patient, whose life was greatly affected by her mother's stay there.

There is another girl I am in contact with named Mia who has had dreams of dying there in the tunnels. She is only 16 years old and now wants to go face her fears, although I advised her to stay away considering her dreams. Why tempt fate?

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine: 26th Dec 2010 - 00:45 GMT

A major snowstorm is tracking up the East coast right now (Christmas, December 25, 2010). Blizzard conditions are predicted for Portland, Maine and all of Cumberland County here in the Southern
Maine area for tomorrow night (December 26th) into Monday morning. I wonder if those blizzard conditions are already quite near Long Island and Kings Park Psychiatric Center right about now. Can you imagine all those vacant buildings at KPPC, especially one like Building 93, late at night (3 AM) with 50 mph gale-force winds blowing through it? I wish I could be there to experience that. It would be so intense. You wonder what kind of thoughts that kind of weather would stir up on that campus, and what kind of ghosts, too. Merry Christmas, everyone!

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine: 26th Dec 2010 - 00:56 GMT

It makes me wonder if anyone has ever been inside those buildings late at night under those kind of weather conditions, and if so, what it was like? I'll bet that would be quite a story - you know, walking up the stairs to all the different floors while the wind is blowing so hard right outside and the sounds that would make all through the building with some snow even coming in because of all the broken windows? And to get to the top and step out onto that little balcony around the top of Building 93, in those wild winds? Please, if anyone has experienced KPPC under blizzard conditions like this, please write about your experiences here? Thank you.

Mae: 5th Jan 2011 - 02:54 GMT

I Live in kingspark, I basically used to be there 24/7 as a teenager, to most of the buildings. I went recently too but not so much anymore. It's more of a summer thing to me, it's freezing in this weather now. I love going and taking fantastic photos of every great sight I see. Plus, the cops were really watching the buildings, it's tricky sometimes, getting caught wasn't to fun. But that never stops me. I could just feel the energy change once in the buildings, a feeling as if ur being watched.. It gets me excited and my adrenalin pumping.. I hear and see some weird things in there. It's a really special place!

Mae: 5th Jan 2011 - 02:54 GMT

I Live in kingspark, I basically used to be there 24/7 as a teenager, to most of the buildings. I went recently too but not so much anymore. It's more of a summer thing to me, it's freezing in this weather now. I love going and taking fantastic photos of every great sight I see. Plus, the cops were really watching the buildings, it's tricky sometimes, getting caught wasn't to fun. But that never stops me. I could just feel the energy change once in the buildings, a feeling as if ur being watched.. It gets me excited and my adrenalin pumping.. I hear and see some weird things in there. It's a really special place!

Jason aka Nightraven: 9th Jan 2011 - 22:41 GMT

I try not to go there in the winter too much either. Like Mae said it's freaking cold out there by the water and all those broken windows don't supply any relief once inside of the buildings. Besides snow only leaves tracks to be followed. You lose your sense of stealth. I'm sure during the daylight with that kind of weather it must be beautiful out there, though. If someone lives out there and wants to take a few pics of Building 93, 7, or the Quad to post it here, that would be great. Otherwise you can email them to me at Ginvestigators@aol.com. I'd greatly appreciate it and would even consider using them in my upcoming book giving you full credit, of course. Thanks.

Jason aka Nightraven: 9th Jan 2011 - 22:46 GMT

I had to make this one using a photo editing program because I only have aerial shots taken by plane thanks to one of the former workers... KP.

[IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/2jg3vxh.jpg[/IMG]

Jason aka Nightraven: 9th Jan 2011 - 22:48 GMT

Sorry, had some trouble uploading the pic here. Here is the link.

http://i52.tinypic.com/2jg3vxh.jpg

Jason aka Nightraven: 20th Jan 2011 - 00:10 GMT

Hey, Chris Grasse... I need to talk to you about the book I am working on regarding the KPPC. I was planning to use some of the entries you made on this blog. I wanted to make sure it was okay with you. I'd like to also use your name and location when I list your entries. If you'd rather I don't use your last name, then please let me know. Otherwise you will be in my book, but I figured you might like that. You can contact me here or by my email address... Ginvestigators@aol.com.

Jason aka Nightraven: 20th Jan 2011 - 01:57 GMT

I am curious if there is anyone out there who has ever become seriously sick after going to the KPPC. By that I mean those of you who sneak into the buildings and tunnels without the proper protection from asbestos and lead. I would love to hear from someone who can help send the message out there that going into these buildings can be very unhealthy. Is there someone who would be willing to talk about that sort of experience?

amanda : 24th Jan 2011 - 00:39 GMT

jason
hi my name is amanda i have been inside of building 7 all the way to the top and have evidence on digital recorder and a basic video recorder that is on my cell phone. that building is now closed off and the doors are sealed shut completely. i am trying to get into building 93. ive been there a few times. everytime that i have gone there i was there searching the grounds for several hours at a time snow, cold, hot, rain. ive search in all kinds of weather. i have alot of info on the park that you may like to use for your book if you interested. i also have done alot of research on the place. if you can contact me at my email amandaconte94@yahoo.com. thank you. i am looking forward to sharing what i know with you.

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine: 25th Jan 2011 - 00:40 GMT

Jason, I am honored and pleased you would want to use any or all of my entries here on Sean's website about KPPC. I give you full permission to use all that I have written here with full blessings. And Thank You for taking the time and making the effort to create your valuable new book. I know it will be excellent and a success. I also give you full permission to use my full name and address in South Portland, Maine, as well, if you would like to do that. My hat is well off to you for the undertaking of such a vital and ambitious project to record the history and archive all the stories of and about such a fascinating (to just about everyone) place. Everything I write about Kings Park Psychiatric Center is based upon my feelings about the place when I tune into it in my mind, psychically. KPPC always gives off such strong energy, it always strikes a strong chord within my being. It pulls me there intuitively. Everything I have written about KPPC has been while feeling I was truly there while writing. The vibrations at or near Potters Field are especially intense. I am so pleased you would want to use anything I may have written here. Thank you for your interest. - Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine.

Jason aka Nightraven: 28th Jan 2011 - 00:35 GMT

Thanks, Amanda and Chris. I've sent you both emails, which you have already responded to, so thanks, again. I've been working on the book everyday for the past week or so. It is nice to be back into the flow of things. I took a break during the holidays.

Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine: 2nd Feb 2011 - 01:27 GMT

Another blizzard is about to arrive at the old psychiatric hospital! The ghost ship is about to rock! I'll bet the radiators used to bang when it got cold there at night when the place was in full swing during the winter months. The sound of sleet pounding against the windows back when they were in place and ten-foot snowdrifts were not an uncommon sight around the campus. A sub-zero sleeping bag, some warm wool socks, the wind howling through Building 93, all its windows broken out now, late at night while that monster storm (one of the biggest in years) works its way across the country and up the East coast... somebody, someday, is going to be at Kings Park Psychiatric Center during one of these wild blizzards and they are going to get some of the greatest photographs you ever saw. The winds whipping up the ocean so close by Long Island with its biting, damp and raw, frigid air, the sound of the wind in the trees and buildings, strange sounds everywhere on a wild night. What an intense video special that would make to upload to this website, you know, something that would last about fifteen minutes. I am sitting here in the warmth of my comfortable bedroom miles away by my computer imagining the setting at KPPC right now, and especially how it's going to be a little later tonight. Just the strength of the gale force winds on that little balcony around the top of Building 93 is enough to hold me. I imagine getting out onto that balcony at about three in the morning, in the dark and looking out over the expanse before me so high up there I am right now, and just standing there, braving the elements for about ten minutes. You know it would be pretty wild, feeling the snow blowing against my face, tightening my toes inside my boots to keep them warmer, shielding my face with my gloved hands. Sooner or later someone we know is going to post some great pictures of absolutely wild weather conditions at KPPC. The wild weather is like part of the whole story the previous residents want told. Thanks for reading my foolish ravings. Submitted by Chris Grasse in South Portland, Maine, February 1, 2011.

jlorch: 2nd Feb 2011 - 16:09 GMT

In summer of 1967 I worked at KP as an aide in "maximum security medical building" - hard to remember but think this is close to what it was called. In the fall of 1967 I was a nursing student within a three year program affiliated with C.W. Post college. I'm interested in any information about the program, especially the building the nursing student dorms were housed in. I never finished nursing school, but currently an artist and planning a series of photo illustrations on my experiences there. If anyone has info relating to this, and especially how I could go about requesting entry into some of the buildings I'd greatly appreciate it. Janet Lorch, Fenton MI.

Jason aka Nightraven: 3rd Feb 2011 - 00:54 GMT

Janet, call up the Kings Park Heritage Museum... (631) 269-3305.

Ce'Neidra : 14th Feb 2011 - 08:59 GMT

Well, I wen't there a couple years back late at night. Me, my brother and some friends broke in through the basement window. When we got there the window at the top right corner of the building was lit up with light. I didnt think of it at the moment but there was no electricity in that building so no light could have been on. It was by far one of the scariest encounters of my life, while in there you feel very uneasy, paranoid, and scared. It's not a place people should go for fun, its dangerous( meaning it is a very old building, and alot of homeless people live there that are very agressive) and it was a place where people were tourtured and killed.

danny: 15th Feb 2011 - 00:15 GMT

hey i went her one night and we hered people talking and srceaming and all of this stuff happened... go to sweet-hollow-road...go and find history behind this road...

Jason aka Nightraven: 15th Feb 2011 - 23:21 GMT

I've been to Sweet Hollow Road many times and the only thing that ever happens is I waste gas and a lot of time. Although I did have a good time scaring the hell out of other people that were there. They never knew it was me. Hey, I was bored.

danny: 19th Feb 2011 - 02:23 GMT

we see people all the time on sweet hollow road.and there was a ufo siting there

Jason aka Nightraven: 19th Feb 2011 - 08:47 GMT

Who wants to go to Sweet Hollow Road to see people? I see people everywhere I go. I'm not impressed. I want to see ghosts. UFOs sound good, but I am pretty sure I can see that anywhere, too. I get tired of driving up and down that narrow road and wasting my gas. I can only spend so much time putting my car in neutral under the overpass. Nothing ever happens. I got a nice misty photo in front of the cemetery, but that's it.

Shadowfax: 24th Feb 2011 - 03:06 GMT

Spring 1966 I landed (court ordered) in Kings Park (I was 15) but it wasn't my first time to the nuthouse (as a serious truent I was often threatened with confinement & repeatedly brought to court in Brooklyn (once when I was 11 & again at age 13) My memory of the few months spent at Kings Park is somewhat fractured. I'm glad to have found this dialog because I hope someone can produce a photo of the female adolescent unit where I was housed.. I graduated there after having spent a short-time with the more seriously affected patients (scare tactic) I've a vague recollection of that horrid brick structure (multi-story building seen early-on where the outdoor vistas appear) To me Suffork County seems so far away now that I live in Central Jersey.. Without a car I wouldn't be expected to make the physical trip down memory lane so I'm hoping someone may have a pic (pehaps a snap from long ago) I remember the Adolescent Unit was rather small & partly constructed of wood so it may not have stood the test of time.. Please advise

`elle.: 25th Feb 2011 - 09:10 GMT

I have been here during the day [in it]. I was fortunate enough to get a tour from some other kids that spotted me and my stepsister. I'm planning to go back, with some cameras and camcorders.

As for the Sweet Hollow Road that's recently fallen into discussion, I have been there as well. Nothing happened under the pass for myself, either. As for what happened, was a weird noise- that could have just been rope rubbing on a tree from a swing of some sorts.

Though if you keep going through, you come to a point where you're able to make a left turn [or right depend which way you come from]. Down there is Mt. Misery. There's a trail back there, but just driving to the dead end alone I saw in the woods that there were small bouncing red lights coming closer. Uhm, like the little red light on a camcorder when recording? but bouncing around too quickly to actually get a shot of anything. I still have no clue what it was, but can't wait to go back in warmer weather to find out.

eric vahouny: 26th Feb 2011 - 02:44 GMT

my name is eric vahouny. i live in a place called kings park, in virginia, on victoria road. if anyone is out there. let me know.

Jason aka Nightraven: 1st Mar 2011 - 00:43 GMT

Hey, Elle... according to ghost legends of Mt. Misery Road those lights you saw probably could have been the spirits of patients, who were burned alive when an insane patient named Mary burned down Mt. Misery Hospital. The hospital was located at the end of Mt. Misery Road, where there is now a large clearing in the woods. If you look on Google Earth you can see it. The road was blocked to prevent people from driving that way.

Jason aka Nightraven: 1st Mar 2011 - 00:51 GMT

Shadowfax, would you consider telling me your story to use in my upcoming book about the KPPC? If so, then send me an email at Ginvestigators@aol.com. I have a lot of photos of the hospital buildings, too. I believe you were kept in Building 21.

Do you recall the ward number? It would have to be in the 200s, if that helps. Wards 202-214 could be found in this building. Otherwise, you were most likely in Building 22, where the children's ward was located during that time. The wards in this building ranged from Ward 215-228.

Shadowfax: 3rd Mar 2011 - 05:08 GMT

Not much of a story here Jason (inasmuch as I was considered a juvenile delinquent back in the day) The nuthouse for me was rather ill-advised since I refused the medication (for which there were no consequences) I
sat around a dayroom busy at my needlepoint sewing.. Years before landing in Kings Park the authorities tried reform school (Spofford in the Bronx) The effect of that place wore off soon as I got home.. Fed-up with living with the likelihood of another confinement I split 1968 for California &
came of age there.. I wiped the slate clean so I can't remember a KPPC ward number.. I can picture no persons in my unit younger than myself (me being the youngest of the lot at each confinement) I won't challenge it if Building 21 is where you believe I was kept (you're the expert here) With no photo to compare my memory to I'll gladly rely on your documentation..
Twenty-two years ago I was in alotta trouble & the courts contacted Kings Park for my records (I've copies of these somewhere) I'll be in touch but in the meantime I did visit your site but didn't know what-pix-were-what (the info you provided above'll make it easier for me to put 2&2 together)
Thanx for your return comments hey it's nice to know someone's got a deep & abiding interest in the place.. The grounds as I remember 'em were breathtaking yet nowhere near how lovely it must've been there during the Kings Park heyday..

kp22: 3rd Mar 2011 - 08:09 GMT

im doing a psychology paper on the kings park psychiatric center and the treatment history of the patients. your pictures are great!; very interesting to look at. i moved to kings park when i was four years old and grew up here. i played soccer at tiffany field for over ten years. i have been curious for YEARS now about these abandoned buildings but never walked through them. when i was in high school, my friend and i drove through, parked and walked behind one of the buildings but got cought by a security guard and got a trespassing ticket. so i guess you could say i am hesitant on trying again. i strongly believe in spirits and the afterlife and that is a main reason why i want to explore the buildings, also because i have been a kings park resident for almost twenty years and its almost a crime not "trespass" at least once. its kind of a huge tease to kings park students, placing the high school full of curious rebellious teens right across from the psych center and then making that third of our town "OFF LIMITS"...i'm taking a run on the bike path that goes through the psych center this weekend so maybe that will push me to explore. to be completely honest, i am terrified!!! terrified, but highly amused by these ghost stories and abandoned hallways. my town was build around this hospital so i think i have the right to explore. wish me luck! =-)

Jason aka Nightraven: 7th Mar 2011 - 14:08 GMT

Shadowfax... if you email me I can send you photos that might jog your memory, if you want. Otherwise, if you change your mind and want me to use your story I will, but I will need you to look over some photos to know for sure where you were placed.

KP22... have you visited the Kings Park Heritage Museum at RJO? You will find plenty of information for your paper there. Otherwise, go to the library and check out the Light & Lively booklets located on the second floor all the way to the far right shelf.

Jason aka Nightraven: 7th Mar 2011 - 14:11 GMT

Sean, feel free to jump in anytime, buddy. It is your blog, although sometimes I feel like it's mine. It's fine. If your too busy I am more than happy to help out.

Diana: 19th Mar 2011 - 16:57 GMT

I went into the bowling alley and the auditorium once. It was pretty creepy in there. There were still bowling pins and balls, and I saw a bullet..? I have no idea why it was there. The auditorium was creepy. I went up on the stage and saw a microphone and there were still curtains. I have been there many times. The last time I was there I was caught with my friends by the security guards. I've been scared to go back since. lol

devin: 5th Apr 2011 - 14:14 GMT

i'm planning to make a trip with some friends n i was wondering what the best type of equipment is to bring...feel free t email me Xthewarden420x@aim.com with any helpful information.

devin: 6th Apr 2011 - 13:37 GMT

i was also hoping to meet up with another photographer in hopes of getting so amazing pictures

Jason aka Nightraven: 7th Apr 2011 - 00:32 GMT

Dress dark, travel in a small group, and take an asbestos mask if you plan on entering a building or tunnel. Keep quiet and try not to break anything. Behavior like that only makes security tighter on everyone else.

devin: 7th Apr 2011 - 13:38 GMT

is there another type of mask that would work because when i was looking to get an asbestos mask and they were sitting around $25 each

Jason aka Nightraven: 17th Apr 2011 - 14:48 GMT

Asbestos exposure can cause lung cancer and mesothelioma. Not wearing the proper type of mask will leave you at risk. Is entering these buildings really worth that much to you? Think smart and wear the proper protection. You can't live forever, but I am sure you don't want to live a short life.

devin: 27th Apr 2011 - 13:40 GMT

you make a good point. i hope to meet up with you one day and explore some of the buildings and the grounds.

Ryanbrahhh: 27th Apr 2011 - 20:35 GMT

Whats going on guys? I've been going to KPPC for years now exploring. Theres a lot of cool stuff there if you take the time to go through each building. Last time i was there the tunnels were welded shut. Just wondering if you can still get into them? It was alot easier getting around through them.

recon: 29th Apr 2011 - 13:37 GMT

i was able to get in through the basement of the quad but i havent been through recently i cant say if they blocked it off somewhere down the line but it is deffinately still open at the entrance.

devin: 29th Apr 2011 - 14:11 GMT

does anyone know how to get into building 7 without setting the alarm off i want to get some pictures in therebut id rather not get arrested for trespassing so close to bootcamp

devin: 29th Apr 2011 - 14:15 GMT

btw jason, when are you going to release your book i would love to read it this place has always facinated me and i would love to buy it and learn some of its history

devin: 29th Apr 2011 - 14:15 GMT

btw jason, when are you going to release your book i would love to read it this place has always facinated me and i would love to buy it and learn some of its history

Kelly: 12th Jun 2011 - 23:15 GMT

I would love to hear from anyone with information about KPPC. My Great-Grandmother and we believe my Great Uncle died there. We have been unable to find out any information on why they were there. We are also unable to find any info on where my Great Uncle is buried. Anyone that can help please email me. frye_kelly0416@comcast.net

Jason aka Nightraven: 14th Jun 2011 - 01:10 GMT

I am hoping to get the book finished by the end of this year. I have loads of information now. I've been working on it a lot lately. I will definitely let everyone know when it comes out.

By the way, Kelly... it is possible your great uncle was buried at the Potter's Field Cemetery of the hospital located just off of Old Dock Road. There are many graves only marked by numbers and many more that were never marked at all. You might be able to find out if you contact Pilgrim State Hospital. They have a lot of old records. Give them his name and ask away. Good luck.

Hey Jason: 28th Jun 2011 - 04:42 GMT

Jason,

Do you really want to know the truth about what went on in there?
I was a patient for 3-4 years,It was a NIGHTMARE!!!!!!!!

Jason aka Nightraven: 2nd Jul 2011 - 02:03 GMT

Please, tell me your story, if you want it published in my book.

http://kppcajourneythroughhistory.webs.com/apps/blog/

Jason aka Nightraven: 2nd Jul 2011 - 02:05 GMT

You can contact me through my email address, if you want at Ginvestigators@aol.com.

kristen: 14th Jul 2011 - 19:25 GMT

this place is said to be haunted. is it really haunted, or it it just people making stories up.?

devin: 18th Jul 2011 - 13:32 GMT

best advice i can give anyone entering the tunnels:wear a hard hat. i hit my head about a dozen times just walking from the quad to 93...not fun.

Chris: 19th Jul 2011 - 23:06 GMT

This place is amazing, I have been here twice myself but was never able to get in, I would love to get inside and take some photos and video footage. If anybody knows of ways in please email me at Xel3m3ntsk8x3@aim.com

GDN: 3rd Aug 2011 - 17:44 GMT

I was a patient in the female adolescent ward in the early 1960's. I believe it was 1964/1965. I could really tell you a few good stories about how those girls were treated.

Devin: 9th Aug 2011 - 13:40 GMT

GDN, please tell us your story. I'm sure many of us would like to hear it, especially Nightraven.

Vanessa: 11th Aug 2011 - 07:22 GMT

These pictures were real creepy, i'd love to know more of the stories behind all of this, though.

Devin: 15th Aug 2011 - 13:53 GMT

Vanessa, stay tuned for Jason's book. I'm sure everything he covers will answer all of your questions.

Jason aka Nightraven: 19th Aug 2011 - 23:17 GMT

GDN, if you want your story told in a book, then please contact me. I am looking for stories from former patients. You can write it here or send me an email at Ginvestigators@aol.com. I can keep you anonymous, if you prefer it that way.

BrewsterM: 2nd Oct 2011 - 06:32 GMT

From the looks of many of these comments, many of you would've felt right at home at KPPC...

Finally found and placed a marker on my great-great grandmother's grave at the old Indian Head Road Cemetery. She was manic-depressive and born too early (1839) to be effectively treated, and she spent her final 23 years at KPPC. There is no public record of her other than her name on three census records, a passenger list documenting her immigration from Germany in 1885 with the surviving 5 of her 15(!) children, and her commitment papers. She died without benefit of family present, nor did they even come to her funeral, such as it was. Since there are no records of her stay at KPPC, I am uncertain any family member ever visited her. Her life was unknown to our family until I discovered her via the census records and did some serious digging. She was a real human being, and at least part of her story is now known. There are thousands like her in that cemetery, yet I couldn't find another marker. There are no ghosts there - just people waiting to be found. I'd highly recommend looking into your family history; the biggest part of mine was found because of this woman. Her medical records provided an intake narrative that disclosed huge amounts of family information that I never, ever would have discovered. Peace.

dani: 6th Oct 2011 - 02:09 GMT

amazing ...i am very intrigued by these stories and cannot wait to read your book Jason.

dana: 18th Oct 2011 - 00:16 GMT

I have reason to believe that my long lost grandmother was institutionalized here. I believe that she died there in 1978 after spending most of her adult life hospitalized. Does anyone have any idea if there might be any records of patients anywhere and how to get them?
Certainly it is past the time required to keep records but sometimes hospitals keep them on microfich. I'd appreciate any ideas, information anyone could give me. Thanks

Jason aka Nightraven: 30th Oct 2011 - 23:10 GMT

I like your first comment, Brewster. Funny, but true in so many ways. Good job on getting a grave marker put down for your great-great grandmother. I believe I heard about you during my research. Are you the one, who contacted Mr. Hunsucker of Pilgrim State Hospital? If so, would you be able to give me his contact information? My email address is Ginvestigators@aol.com. I would greatly appreciate it. Also, maybe if you'd like I could use your story in my book. I think it is nice to show how people can still be affected by long lost relatives, who were once patients. It's up to you. I could just use what's already on the blog, if it is easier. Otherwise, we can talk more about it via emails.

Jason aka Nightraven: 30th Oct 2011 - 23:11 GMT

Dana, have you tried contacting Pilgrim State Hospital? Call this number (631) 761-3500, or (631) 761-3822.

Jason aka Nightraven: 30th Oct 2011 - 23:12 GMT

Sign the Petition to Save the Kings Park Psychiatric Center

Ever since 2009 there has been talk of demolishing 14 structures from the Kings Park Psychiatric Center. However, due to financial restraints it continuously gets postponed. The state has allocated funds to finally get the job done. As early as May of 2012 there will be 15 structures to be demolished unless we act now.

Together we can help save these buildings from demolition. Over the years the buildings and the grounds of the center have almost become a historical landmark to the small town of Kings Park. Many have traveled from afar to visit the grounds of the former psyche center in order to take part in a unique experience that can only come from being there in person. The feeling is different for all... and yes, for some it might even bring back nightmares. Still, the place which is now better known as the Nissequogue River State Park is very serene and fascinating to the eyes. To be able to stand there and behold these long abandoned structures is breathtaking, especially the ominous Building 93.

If these structures are destroyed it will be just another field of rubble.... later to become just another shopping center or a haunted housing development, where no one will want to live. The asbestos and lead contamination goes down too deep in the ground. It is spread too far. It is best to leave the place as it is to avoid the possibility of living somewhere that can be unsafe after extended exposure.

Help by signing this petition and save the buildings to help save ourselves in the long run.

http://helpkppc.com/

Rachael: 1st Nov 2011 - 02:33 GMT

Hey Sean, not sure if you remember me, but I was on the LIO forum for a long time (sad how everyone left it, by the way).

I have a question for anyone who lived near KPPC while it was still functioning. I used to see this man in a blue flannel shirt & jeans walking around a lot. He was really pale looking. It creeped me out as a kid (this was in the early 90s until it closed). I don't know if I was seeing a ghost or what, lol. I had assumed he was from KPPC. All I remember was that he looked so creepy that it freaked me out.

Does anyone remember seeing this man, or anyone who even looked similar? Or am I just crazy... lol

House of Metal Bars: 28th Nov 2011 - 00:52 GMT

I’m really allured by the KPPC and the discussions here albeit from M’sia. Just by looking at the pictures gave me the goose bumps. Just felt if I’m there in person, my senses could be heighten to the point of making my imagination run wild. Then I would go mad and lost inside if the unknown tries to make me. The place is sinister yet serene to me and though very much abandoned I’m sure its “alive”. I’m impressed by all of you and your nerve to enter KPPC in its present state… really requires strong mental strength.

I do wonder after its closure in 96’ were there any deaths… Not that I wish for it, but cases where things gone horribly wrong for whatever reasons by just being there? I’m also curious with what the cops or guards have to say since they patrolled there regularly. Or perhaps about the findings by reputable paranormal teams…

I hope Jason for your every success with the book. Hope nothing uncalled for occurs from the dead or from the living ones as you unravel the truth and secret of KPPC. I also hope for that place to remain as it is instead of wiping it off for the sake of more property developments. And for those who still wish to wander inside, good luck to you. Lastly, I hope the inputs here continue at least till you people had discussed a bit on Jason’s book on KPPC. Ciao

Jackie: 28th Nov 2011 - 03:09 GMT

ANYONE WITH GOOD STORIES? Share them please! Especially about how adolescents/teenage girls were treated!!!!!!!!

Smoke : 7th Dec 2011 - 07:01 GMT

Hi every one I been to this place so many time the first time we went it was really crazy. I don't know if it makes a different's it  was a fool moon and it was 12. We drove in from the front where the two house are with people living in them. We got to the gate my friend got so scared he stopped the car and asked me to drive. As I got out the car I see a small beam of light I'm thinking it's just the road. My friend in the back seat is like dude that s**t is moving to us, I give it no mind get in the car I started driving as i move to the small light it came toward us, I drove faster and faster so did the light to us. Out of no where it just leaves. I keep driving then we start to see buildings we get to a bus stop and some guy was walking back and forth. Every one in the back of the car saw some one else sitting near the trees. Scarred to death I keep driving I don't see the building 93 so I turned around and did the crazy ,I went and talked to the dude that was walking back and forth. I go and pull up every one in the car is yelling dude are you mad he could be a ghost. So I start off asking him what are you doing here no answer, where is building 93 he answers it's far away I'm like wow we where yelling and screaming for nothing. So I ask him do you know where it is ,he point in to the dark go that way. So I drive off to the dark see the old tree and fire house.  I stop and trying to look around every one is like dude it's there. It came in to my site all the hair in my body went up so fast. We drive back the way we came from the dude was gone the one on the bus top and the one near trees. So I started driving back and the wend started to catch up didn't make it better with the trees looking scary. So I'm doing 60 trying to get out of there fast out of no where, I see a big orb idk for 5sc it felt like I lost Control of the car was crazy turned the car Gps the way and got out of there fast. But if any one can help me I'm trying to go in side this time. So Plz if some one can tell me how to get in side would be so cool.  

anonymous: 2nd Jan 2012 - 22:54 GMT

i was a patient there,1985,89,90,93,94-the hospital changed my life in a very positive direction.no one knows what those buildings really "saY unless you worked or were a ptient there.ghosts?haunted?only by those sneaking around at night and haunting it themselves.stay off hallowed grounds.thanks

Vincent: 21st Feb 2012 - 03:38 GMT

Hey guys, I am planning a trip to KPPC soon, ive been there a few times but have been unable to to find any ways in. I was wondering if there is anybody who can help me out with any information on ways into any of the buildings my email is D.TECH9@aim.com. I have an asbestos mask and all that. I would just love to explore the place and hopefully get some great pictures and video footage!

Judy Bindas: 20th Mar 2012 - 17:18 GMT

Hi everyone My Grandmother was admitted to Kings Park in 1932. She died and is buried on site in the Paupers field. Sadly my father was separated from her when he was 3 months old. He was told growing up that his mother was dead, But she was alive and living in Kings Park until 1969. In the early 80's I started looking for her and my travels brought me to Kings Park Sanatorium, Now known as Pilgrims Pride Psychiatric Center.If anyone is looking for a former Patient of kings Park they have all the records still on site. You will need to speak with Mrs. Debra Stuby who is the Director of Medical Records..My Grand Mother was not violet and could have come home on weekends they told us if they had known about any living relatives. She was housed in building 21 until her death in 1969.Please remember that this facility when opened was beautiful and was considered state of the art. Patients were taken care of very well and non violent patients could walk around outside and could even Plant flowers or work on the farm.When you walk around and in it's building Remember the people that not only lived their but the Hundreds of Family members who have and are looking for Grandparents info and will never know that their loved ones were Patients of this remarkable place. And to anyone still living that worked at Kings Park I would Like to thank you for taking such good care of mt grandmother while she lived.

Vincent: 5th Apr 2012 - 02:27 GMT

just got back from a trip to kppc, the place is awsome

drew: 12th Apr 2012 - 17:33 GMT

My mother worked in the cafe of KPPC. She tells me stories of how the patients would throw food around the cafeteria, and how she made minimum wage in the 70's.

Jeannine F: 21st Apr 2012 - 10:03 GMT

KPSHMRU, YES THAT WAS MY BROTHER BOB YOU WORKED WITH AND WENT TO SCHOOL WITH.

Devin: 25th Apr 2012 - 16:24 GMT

Vincent, email me with any questions you have i may be able to help out.
xthewarden420x@aim.com

Dave Prestigiacomo: 3rd Jun 2012 - 22:52 GMT

Worked at KPPC from 1976 to 1985.I worked in Group4 bldg 21 and bldg 135. my mom was an RN in bldg 7 Eleanor Kozlik. thay called her Ellie. i was an M.H.T.A and lived in Home-T bldg 144. was party city back then and co-ed woo hoo. miss my co-workers. great people.you should see the sub-basements in group4 go down over 5 levels. in 76 we found civil defense item stored down below from the 1950s long forgotten, food, medical supplies etc.. in case the bomb dropped.was good friends with Vito Campenetto at Home-T room 210. i was in 206. worked ward 206 in group 4. Vito loved Tennis and his Kite that took ariel photos of KPPC. Miss him too...Dave Prestigiacomo

David Prestigiacomo: 5th Jun 2012 - 02:21 GMT

You kids dont know anything, worked KPPC from 76 to 85. Sorry guys but no ghosts or spirits. yes there are sub basements. Was a great place to work. i miss the place. they did perform E C T electro convulsive therapy. Was present at over 400 of them. it was very humane and did help about 75 percent of the Manics. The cookoos nest movie is very close to what it really was like.Us mental hygiene therapy aides and the nurses dispensed the medications. the most popular meds at that time were Thoazine, melaril, navane,sinequam and valium. many patients had a side effect to the meds called tongue rolling or tardif dyskenysia as the doctors called it.But that was a small price to pay considering the meds kept them under control and mostly non-violent at least some of the time.They had Color T.V in the day roomm and daily activities for the patients like pic-nics etc... Some wards had pool tables and ping pong. They had food service/ dining rooms. Food wasent bad but the eggs in the morning were powdered eggs and when cooked by steam method which was what they did, made the eggs turn a green color, but they tasted fine.Many patients in Group 4 had private rooms and the lower functioning ones were in dorms.My last place i worked there was Bldg. 135 in the back. was a great place to work. much higher functioning patients who went to work during the day and returned in evening for chow and watch T.V and relax. they all had private rooms there. I remember them watching Taxi, Cheers, Threes Company, Hill Street Blues etc...(The 70s and 80s).Medication time was 5pm and 9pm.I worked that 3-11 shift. in 1980 i made 19,000 a year. A fair wage at that time.Benefits were great. Got a fair retirement and the health insurance was GREAT. We had our own credit union down in the basement of the administration bldg. as long as you joined you were never turned down for a loan no matter how bad your credit was. and you could take small loans like 200 bucks if you wanted and only have 1% finance charge!!! try to find that today, NO WAY! Everybody got along black, white etc... No animosity like in todays work places. I lived in Home-T bldg 144 staff housing. they charged 25 dollars a month for your room which had a sink and refrigerator,and that 25 dollars included your water and electric! Bathrooms and showers were shared off the hallway.It was co-ed and many romances started there among staff. im sorry that they are demolishing the place. lots of memories. David Prestigiacomo Port Richey, Florida.

Carol Baldasarra: 6th Jun 2012 - 13:33 GMT

My mom and oldest sister worked there for many years. I can remember as a very younf child my dad would bring my little sister and I up there on paydays to see my mom. My mother would bring us in to the open hall to visit with the older women. I was about four at the time. The women would play baby dolls with us, I think it would bring childhood memories back to them for a short while, good memories. Every Thanksgiving and Christmas my mom would bring a patient home to have dinner, yes they were crazy but still people. It was a little spooky for us going there but my mother felt it was important for them to see young children. They would sometimes even remember us from time to time. There was a women who would play the piano with such grace, her face would lit up when we would sit on the piano bench with her. She would tell us storeis of how she play for the Queen Mother. To give these women, whatever their condition was, a few minutes of their childhood back was something I have carried for life.

Danny Gaulier: 7th Jun 2012 - 12:23 GMT

I was born in France and lived in Smithtown since 1954, till moving to Jacksonville Florida in 2006. I remember playing baseball on the field to the left of the main road as you headed towards the bluff. My brother and several friends worked there in the late 70'till the late 80's. They told me of horrible things that some staff would do to the patients there, especially the female ones who were attractive. They all said they never saw abuse of the patients but heard from many sources it happened and to some degree, still did. The abuse usually occured at night when most of the Administrative Staff was gone. Most of those that worked at night were the dregs of society that accepted the very low paying job for the "patients with benefits" type of thing. I can only hope that the Universe paid back these low life maggots in a very hurtful way. I always come up every summer around the end of July. Would like to meet with others to possible tour the facility and share stories of growing up in Smithtown, Kings Park, Commack, Nesconset, St James, Head of the Harbour, etc. I can be contacted at: Thymefouryou@aol.com or at 904-716-6929. Love & Light to all...Danny Gaulier SCHS Class of 67'

David Prestigiacomo M-H-T-A: 11th Jun 2012 - 02:46 GMT

I never saw any abuse of female or male patients when i worked there. Whoever told you that Danny was mis-informed. patients were well cared for always.

David Prestigiacomo M-H-T-A: 11th Jun 2012 - 23:31 GMT

Boy, Im looking through all these sites on the internet about King Park State Hospital and cant believe all the B.S. that is being said . I never thought that when i lived and worked there back in the 70s and 80s that so much folk lore and myths would exist today. The only thing i ever saw that really existed was in the basement of the old M.R. unit which was towards the back of the property headed towards the admistration bldg but i dont remember the bldg. number. In that basement you could still see the iron shackles still bolted to the wall and floor where back in the late 1800s they used to shackle the patients in a sitting position on the floor to these restraints. there was a valley in the concrete in the floor to allow the urine and fecal matter to travel into a drain. But remember these things were in the basement of a very old building and this type of treatment was conducted back in the days way way before medications and back when they called the place Kings Park Asylum for the disturbed and Insane. I thought that was kind of creepy when i saw that when i was about 19 years old. Im 54 now and still think of that. Dave Prestigiacomo class of 1976 Smithtown High East. Still miss the Kings Park Bluff!!! Peace.

David Prestigiacomo M.H.T.A: 14th Jun 2012 - 01:52 GMT

I stand corrected.I talked to my mom and she reminded me that the Credit Union was not in the basement of the administration bldg. but was instead in the basement of bldg. 90 Macy Home.Macy Home was also the Bldg. that housed personnel or human resources as its called today. That was where I was hired back in 1976. Sorry, its been 36 years and my memory sometimes is off a bit. David Prestigiacomo

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steveo: 21st Aug 2012 - 20:38 GMT

My children and friends have asked have I ever entered the grounds when I was a child, considering I lived near by....the answer was yes. The Boys Scout of America thought it was a great idea to send "cub scouts" up in the wards with the patients back in the 60's. To this day i'll never forget the sites, it was nothing but disturbing and by all accounts it was one of the worst decisions an adult has ever made for me. I did nothing but sit there petrified wondering if and when I'll ever leave...what were they thinking these individuals we had to witness were serverelly retarded. What a horrible memory.

Sean: 26th Aug 2012 - 21:21 GMT

I made a trip to experience this place the Friday before they started demolition. I wanted to see all of it before it was gone. On the subject of this topic, a local filmmaker named Michael D'Andrea shot scenes of his movie Peripheral Vision on these grounds and also in the buildings of Pilgrim State. If anyone is interested it's a very good movie, you can buy it on Amazon! These pictures were amazing by the way! Awesome work.

oscar: 1st Sep 2012 - 07:04 GMT

Wow I been going there for the past few days its no where to go I'm not stepping a foot in there we gotta let the spirits be leave them in peace there only angry cause of the torture they put them through and the damage we cause

David PrestigiacomoM.H.T.A: 8th Sep 2012 - 19:07 GMT

So Did they demolish the place and what buildings did they take down? Are any left standing? Im in Florida so Im out of touch. Appreciate a response.David Prestigiacomo

shelley: 26th Sep 2012 - 20:19 GMT

I'm also curious which buildings have been taken down, I've been there hundreds of times taking pictures (I am a senior college student with my BFA in Photography) and the last time I went the recreational building was roped off, my favorite building. I plan to return when I'm home from school but I'm not sure what's left!

Sean: 18th Oct 2012 - 05:39 GMT

I could be wrong, but from my understanding they can't just knock down the buildings. I believe they're abestos filled so they need to strip it from the inside to make sure that issue is all taken care of, and then they can knock it down. I don't think they've gotten too far yet

Judy: 23rd Oct 2012 - 04:33 GMT

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Anna: 27th Oct 2012 - 21:12 GMT

Codziennie oglądam te zdjęcia.. The walls without windows remind me of the picture Edvarda Muncha " Krzyk"

David Prestigiacomo: 8th Nov 2012 - 02:52 GMT

I do miss the place. working there, living there and the seventies. It was a great place and a great time. Miss Home-T room 206 Bldg 144 and the parties and people. Long Live KPPC and the memories !!!! Dave Prestigiacomo M.H.T.A Long Live The Kings Park Bluff !!! Hey Vito Campanetto Room 210. Hey Fran room 204 we had a good time !Hey Group 4 Ward 206 Angie Engleman, Fran, Fuchie, Bonnie, Carol Carrano dayshift!!! Love your old co-worker David.It was real!!

Ruth: 28th Jan 2013 - 00:06 GMT

I have been going to Kings park for many years and I have always love it. I am sad to say that I went there today and was extremely
disturbed by the vandalism. I know it has been a problem but they completely ripped the copper off all the main buildings. It is only a matter of time when the roofs will cave in on all the building due to no gutters and giant holes in the roofs. I talked to the person in the office and she said that it is a major problem that they can't do anything about. I hope that karma hits them right in the face and they get ridden with asbestos poisoning. Dirtbags!

David Prestigiacomo: 29th Jan 2013 - 00:59 GMT

Ruth, In your travels at KPPC is bldg 144 Home-T still standing? It was staff housing located behind the administration building and i used to live there. Very curious. Please respond...Dave Prestigiacomo M.H.T.A

Ruth: 29th Jan 2013 - 01:30 GMT

Hey Dave, Yes it is still standing. They actually put some great childrens artwork up to cover the windows. Unfortunately, if vandals continue to tear apart what is left,who knows how long it will be before the whole place is a thing of the past. I am very sad that one day It will all be gone. On a good note from what i could tell they haven't touched that building.

David Prestigiacomo: 6th Feb 2013 - 01:02 GMT

Hey Ruth, Thank you very much for the response! That was nice. I will be retiring in october of this year after 31 plus years in Corrections and Law Enforcement here in Port Richey FL when I turn 55. I got my feet wet at KPPC back in '76 and think of it fondly. Want to come up after October to see the place. I know iLL cry. . . I worked at Group 4, Bldg L, Bldg 135,and Bldg 21. I left there in '88. Was a Deputy Sheriff here in Pasco County from '88 to '94 and those interpersonal skills I used at Kings Park Psych. came in handy as a cop. If you ever want to talk about KPPC or whetever my phone#is (727)342-9195. I miss long Island alot. See ya !

Tunneler: 5th Mar 2013 - 09:23 GMT

I have been in there the last two nights, apparently the tunnels leading into the power plant seem to have been cemented and plywooded over, I tried to figure out another route, but there seems to be no way around it

anon (static-50-53-36-20.bvtn.or.frontiernet.net): 15th Mar 2013 - 10:52 GMT

What is people thinking today? How wrong is all this? Half of the world men and women are mentally ill .. OCD , depression , bipolar. It's sad to see these types of people belittled into this abuse . They were people regardless of the illness ! Did they deserve to be punished for being sick ? No . I feel sorry for them . What happens to there families ? They lock um and leave um to rot with a number as there head stone . Shame on them . It's so heart breaking ... Think about if you we're where they were !! Sad isn't it ...

David Prestigiacomo M.H.T.A: 16th Mar 2013 - 23:06 GMT

I disagree, In the 1980s states began shutting down all the state hospitals because they didnt want to handle the cost and the responsibility of the mentally Ill and states began "dumping" mentally Ill patients into ACLF facilities and in many cases "flop houses" in our communities. We ended up with many mentally Ill people in the streets, many with no where to go. Fast foward to today... we have many mentally ill homeless people living in the streets begging. We did not have this back in the 1960s 70s etc...Additionally ,today we now have many mass shootings and murders done by "mentally deranged persons" who prior to the mid 1980s probebly would have been commited to a state hospital, thats a fact. Many of todays gun problems is a result of dumping.

Jason aka Nightraven: 18th Apr 2013 - 13:50 GMT

Hey, everyone. It's been a while since I wrote here. I have been working on several projects that have kept me quite busy. I had to put my KPPC: A Journey Through History book on hold, until they finish up with the demolitions. I want to make sure to include photos of that and the aftermath. I have been lucky enough to get some great shots of pretty much every building as they were being demolished. I was also inside of each one at some point in the past, so I have photos of them to keep the memory alive in my book. In the meantime, I wrote another book, which is finished. It's called No Hope for the Hopeless at Kings Park and will be available as an E-book on Amazon hopefully by the end of May. Just doing some proof-reading on it. I have a website that I dedicated to my writing, but we are not supposed to promote websites here on this blog. Sorry. Search for my book titles and that should help. By the way, David... I am sorry to inform you that I have first hand knowledge that patients were abused at the hospital, especially at Group 2, which was the adolescent unit. There were indeed rapes, beatings, and even patients who were murdered in other buildings, such as Building 1 (Residence by the Sound) and in Buildings 21/22. I won't go into it here, but I have spoken to several former patients, who verify these incidents. Now, I know you like to remember it as a good place to work and I don't blame you. Every former employee I've spoken to loved it there. I am in law enforcement like you and I am sure you've seen your fair share of cruelty in the world, so you know a place like a mental hospital that was that big is not going to exist for over 100 years and not have bad incidents taking place. You can't blind yourself to it. There are too many people in the world, who are assholes. I never would have expected a cop to get arrested for wanting to be a cannibal, but that is exactly what happened last year at my very own precinct when they arrested someone, who I always thought was a nice guy. Trust me.... shit happens. Patients were abused at the hospital. That is a fact. Many workers at the hospital were genuinely nice and did care for the patients. That is another fact. Unfortunately, another fact is that there are sick people in this world, who do what they want as long as they know they can get away with it. If you need any information about Kings Park or the buildings, feel free to email me, as this is not my blog and I only borrow it from my pal, Sean, from time to time. I would like to talk to you Dave, so I will take down your number and give you a call soon. I won't post mine here, though, but my email is Ginvestigators@aol.com. By the way, there are ghosts there. Just not everywhere. I have proof on my other website, which as I said I cannot post here. Dig deep and you will find what I have already posted on my website. I've gotten EVPs in the old playground behind Building 40. I also got some at Group 4, Tiffany Field, and inside of Buildings 7, 23, 93, and 136. I will be working on a film project that will take place at the KPSH back in the old days, but that is still a new project. I can't reveal much about it, yet. I will be co-writing the screenplay/book. I am all over the place, so don't expect me back here anytime soon. Sean, I haven't forgotten about you. I will be in touch about heading out to the grounds with you. Later.

Michele: 24th Apr 2013 - 00:23 GMT

I'm fascinated by the paranormal and everything about it. I never believed in ghosts so when I heard about this place I went without hesitation. I've went about three times, and each time something creepy has happened. Driving up to the place and even just standing outside on the road gives you an immense creepy and terrifying feeling. The first time I went, I didn't know all the way in the back the gate was torn down so to get inside it, I started to climb the gate and as soon as I was about to hop over, we heard screaming coming from behind us. We heard one scream, then two, then three. My friend was recording and happened to catch it on video. You don't hear the screaming flat out you have to listen very carefully to the background noise. The second time I went, I saw a man walking in a hospital robe down the road, and when we drove past him I turned to look back at him and he was gone. The third time I went, my friends and I were exploring the loading docks when we heard my car alarm go off. Everyone started going crazy but I started laughing and saying to relax, that it's only my car alarm but at the time I didn't realize that a car alarm wouldn't go off so randomly. When we came back to my car, my door was wide open. The lights inside were off, everything was off except my car door was wide open and I remember slamming it shut and locking it just incase. When we pulled into a gas station down the door I saw hand prints on my car door imprinted into the dust on my car. I'm going back soon to explore inside building 93 and to go into the tunnels, I can't wait. If anyone has information about the inside of the building and the layout of it, please email me at micheletsunami@aim.com